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Travelers to Unimaginable Lands
Travelers to Unimaginable Lands: Stories of Dementia, the Caregiver, and the Human Brain | Dasha Kiper
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These compelling case histories meld science and storytelling to illuminate the complex relationship between the mind of someone with dementia and the mind of the person caring for them. This book will forever change the way we see people with dementia disordersand the people who care for them.Lori Gottlieb, author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone After getting a masters degree in clinical psychology, Dasha Kiper became the live-in caregiver for a Holocaust survivor with Alzheimers disease. For a year, she endured the emotional strain of looking after a person whose condition disrupts the rules of time, order, and continuity. Inspired by her own experience and her work counseling caregivers in the subsequent decade, Kiper offers an entirely new way to understand the symbiotic relationship between patients and those tending to them. Her book is the first to examine how the workings of the healthy brain prevent us from adapting to and truly understanding the cognitively impaired one. In these poignant but unsentimental stories of parents and children, husbands and wives, Kiper explores the existential dilemmas created by this disease: A man believes his wife is an impostor. A womans imaginary friendships drive a wedge between herself and her devoted husband. Another womans childhood trauma emerges to torment her son. A mans sudden Catholic piety provokes his wife. Why is taking care of a family member with dementia so difficult? Why do caregivers succumb to behaviorsarguing, blaming, insisting, taking symptoms personallythey know are counterproductive? Exploring the healthy brains intuitions and proclivities, Travelers to Unimaginable Lands reveals the neurological obstacles to caregiving, enumerating not only the terrible pressures the disease exerts on our closest relationships but offering solace and perspective as well.
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A compassionate & lucid book that will speak to caregivers of elderly people suffering from cognitive decline. It's not self-help or a solutions-based book, but it's based on the writer's experiences with dementia care as a trained clinical psychologist. The two things I found most helpful was the exploration of how the early stages of cognitive decline can often bring on an *excess* of personality.

batsy This felt very familiar to me, as my siblings & I have often turned to each other to ask: "Is it the dementia/brain illness or is she just being her usual difficult self, but worse?" And the answer, unfortunately, is both. The other helpful thing is the limits of the so-called "healthy" brain, & why the caregiver often feels like they're losing their mind. (They kind of are.) There are no solutions (yet), but it was clarifying to read. 2y
batsy In the course of reading this, it also made me think of how the conception of the "healthy" brain is already riddled with inconsistencies & flaws. If anything, the brain, being a murky, strange, delicate & also deeply resilient thing, is in itself ridiculous. Just a ridiculous thing, the brain. As Kiper writes, "... I still cannot quite accept the fact that the brain's limitations are *my* limitations". As a caregiver, it is so hard to admit. 2y
squirrelbrain Wow, Suba, what a wonderful, heartfelt review. I‘m sorry that you‘re going through this, but it sounds like you and your siblings are supporting each other. 2y
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Cathythoughts Beautiful review ❤️ Mind yourself X 2y
Suet624 Oh Suba. My heart goes out to you. I can only imagine how difficult it must be. 💕 2y
batsy @squirrelbrain @Suet624 Thank you for your kind words, Helen and Sue ❤️ I'm grateful to my siblings and glad we have each other and have also managed to engage the services of a caregiver recently. I feel so bad for people who do this alone. It truly takes a village to raise a child, as they say, and to care for our elders. 2y
batsy @Cathythoughts Thank you, Cathy ❤️ 2y
Aimeesue Lovely review. It‘s such a hard thing, and it can be so reassuring to know that others have been through it and have your experiences validated. Sorry to hear you and your family are going through it. ❤️ 2y
jlhammar Wow, sounds interesting and important. Excellent review! Sorry to hear this is something you‘re familiar with. So difficult. 2y
youneverarrived I can only imagine how difficult this must be to go through. Lovely review ❤️ 2y
batsy @Aimeesue @jlhammar @youneverarrived Thank you ❤️ It's a deeply interesting book that provides so many useful insights. 2y
LeahBergen A great review on a super important topic. Sending love to you! ❤️ 2y
batsy @LeahBergen Thank you, Leah ❤️ 2y
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