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First Love
First Love: Essays on Friendship | Lilly Dancyger
4 posts | 3 read
A bold, poignant essay collection that treats women’s friendships as the love stories they truly are, from the critically acclaimed author of Negative Space “Fiercely felt and finely etched.”—Leslie Jamison, New York Times bestselling author of The Empathy Exams Lilly Dancyger always thought of her closest friendships as great loves, complex and profound as any romance. When her beloved cousin was murdered just as both girls were entering adulthood, Dancyger’s devotion to the women in her life took on a new urgency—a desire to hold her friends close while she still could. In First Love, this urgency runs through a striking exploration of the bonds between women, from the intensity of adolescent best friendship and fluid sexuality to mothering and chosen family. Each essay in this incisive collection is grounded in a close female friendship in Dancyger’s life, reaching outward to dissect cultural assumptions about identity and desire, and the many ways women create space for each other in a world that wants us small. Seamlessly weaving personal experience with literature and pop culture—ranging from fairy tales to true crime, from Anaïs Nin and Sylvia Plath to Heavenly Creatures and the “sad girls” of Tumblr—Dancyger’s essays form a kaleidoscopic story of a life told through friendships, and an expansive interrogation of what it means to love each other. Though friendship will never be enough to keep us safe from the dangers of the world, Dancyger reminds us that love is always worth the risk, and that when tragedy strikes, it’s our friends who will help us survive. In First Love, these essential bonds get their due.
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Tara
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Pickpick

Tough to rate. Love the concept, (essays on close female friendships,) but a lot of times I just wished Dancyger had written more of a cohesive memoir. The separate essay format didn‘t always work for me, yet there are a lot of great passages here.

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Kazzie
Mehso-so

Some of these essays were beautiful, some less so. Overall the idea is nice, to write at friendship at first love. But she was actually trying to honour her cousin, which didn‘t really work as well in this style

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Amor4Libros
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Bailedbailed

Want to preface this by saying that this is in no way the book‘s fault. I feel that this is very coming of age and it is something that I‘m not interested in as much anymore.

Decided to quit at 20% and return to library since there are other people waiting for it.

dabbe #hailthebail! 🤩🤩🤩 6mo
47 likes1 comment
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Amor4Libros
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I‘m getting multiple library holds coming in at the same time, so I need to start getting to some of them (does anyone else get anxiety when other people are waiting for books? 😅)

I‘ve already read a couple of the essays and they‘re pretty good!

willaful ALWAYS happens. 6mo
Ruthiella Totally! I want to be a considerate library patron. 6mo
Lesliereadsalot I always feel guilty as I always have something overdue! 6mo
36 likes3 comments