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Strangers Drowning
Strangers Drowning: Grappling with Impossible Idealism, Drastic Choices, and the Overpowering Urge to Help | Larissa MacFarquhar
What does it mean to devote yourself wholly to helping others? In Strangers Drowning, Larissa MacFarquhar seeks out people living lives of extreme ethical commitment and tells their deeply intimate stories; their stubborn integrity and their compromises; their bravery and their recklessness; their joys and defeats and wrenching dilemmas. A couple adopts two children in distress. But then they think: If they can change two lives, why not four? Or ten? They adopt twenty. But how do they weigh the needs of unknown children in distress against the needs of the children they already have? Another couple founds a leprosy colony in the wilderness in India, living in huts with no walls, knowing that their two small children may contract leprosy or be eaten by panthers. The children survive. But what if they hadnt? How would their parents risk have been judged? A woman believes that if she spends money on herself, rather than donate it to buy life-saving medicine, then shes responsible for the deaths that result. She lives on a fraction of her income, but wonders: when is compromise self-indulgence and when is it essential? We honor such generosity and high ideals; but when we call people do-gooders there is skepticism in it, even hostility. Why do moral people make us uneasy? Between her stories, MacFarquhar threads a lively history of the literature, philosophy, social science, and self-help that have contributed to a deep suspicion of do-gooders in Western culture. Through its sympathetic and beautifully vivid storytelling, Strangers Drowning confronts us with fundamental questions about what it means to be human. In a world of strangers drowning in need, how much should we help, and how much can we help? Is it right to care for strangers even at the expense of those we are closest to? Moving and provocative, Strangers Drowning challenges us to think about what we value most, and why.From the Hardcover edition.
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review
keepingupwiththepenguins
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Pickpick

It‘s a confronting and challenging read, especially if you‘re prone to philosophical debates in your own mind. It‘s important to allow time to read Strangers Drowning gradually, and take breaks to think over what you‘ve read before continuing. A must-read for fans of The Good Place! Full review: https://keepingupwiththepenguins.com/strangers-drowning-larissa-macfarquhar/

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KaraDunn
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The (true!) stories in this book of people "living lives of extreme ethical commitment" are so fascinating. I find the stories more intriguing than inspiring. Can you imagine donating 100 percent of your income to charity? Adopting 22 children? Founding a leper colony in the wilderness? I certainly can't.

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GoneFishing

To drink, to get drunk, is to lower yourself on purpose for the sake of good fellowship. You abandon yourself, for a time, to life and fate. You allow yourself to become stupider and less distinct. Your boundaries become blurry: you open your self and feel connected to people around you. You throw off your moral scruples, and suspect it was only those scruples that prevented the feeling of connection before. You feel more empathy for your fellow..

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AlexandraGriffin
Panpan

I was rather disappointed by this book. I thought it was going to be an analytical look at why some people feel the need for "extreme good-doing" and why some don't, but it basically was a bunch of stories about these extreme cases. ⭐️⭐️ of 5 (cont in the comments)

AlexandraGriffin The author basically tells the stories of various people who have gone to the extreme of "doing good" (the guy who lives off $1200/yr and donates the rest, the family who adopted 20+ kids), without any speculation on where that drive comes from. 8y
AlexandraGriffin Some of the stories were too long and drawn out, to the point that I wouldn't understand why certain things were being shared or what baring it had on the story. Then it was on to the next extreme case. Some of the stories didn't seem to fit the book (the Christian girl who lost her faith?) 8y
AlexandraGriffin While there were a few moments that made me think "huh, that's an interesting idea", overall I found myself wondering about the psychology behind these peoples actions, and was ultimately left disappointed by the book. 8y
BookishFeminist That's a shame! I'm still a bit intrigued by the book but I thought this might be more of a psychological take on altruism, too, since that's what the cover blurb makes it sound like. 8y
AlexandraGriffin @BookishFeminist that's where my disappointment comes from. The author seems to admire these people who basically go through extremes to give to others, but there isn't anything analytical about it. And I'm not sure I agree with the admiration for everyone she highlights in this book. 8y
13 likes5 comments
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AlexandraGriffin
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joe_hill
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Pickpick

A real earthquake of a book. Strangers Drowning examines people who have dedicated themselves to extreme altruism and it's a staggering masterpiece of true life story telling... a deep plunge into the chilliest, darkest waters of ethical living.

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joe_hill
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Great Orwell quote here.

todd I like this. Reminds me of a Tom Waits lyric that occasionally sounds in my head, "How do the Angels get to sleep when the devil leaves his porch light on?" 9y
joe_hill What a line! 9y
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