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Trouble Came to the Turnip
Trouble Came to the Turnip | Caroline Bird
8 posts | 1 read | 3 to read
A collection of zesty, idiosyncratic and formally delightful poems, 'Trouble Came to the Turnip' explores fairy tale, fantasy and the bittersweet world of romance with humour and originality.
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quote
Lindy
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Bathtub Spider

Because I am a bathtub spider,
I want to travel every drain before I die,
stretch every leg, find a plug hole
to really suck me down.
None of this back and forth,
I hate your mood-swings.
I love your mood-swings.
I hate your mood-swings.

sprainedbrain Good lord that‘s huge. 😱 6y
Lindy @sprainedbrain I‘m glad you noticed! It was part of a creature display in Jurassic Forest. 🕷 6y
sprainedbrain @Lindy thank goodness. 😂 6y
Reggie In college my suite mate and I had a shower spider who we let live.... until one of our friends needed to shower and came out proud saying he had killed a huge spider in our shower for us. 6y
Lindy @Reggie 😐Should have introduced them, I guess. 6y
41 likes5 comments
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Lindy
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Sunday

I have two minutes to live
so I‘m going to write a shopping list.
Eggs.
Milk.
Sugar.
Flour.
You can make the pancakes yourself.

review
Lindy
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Pickpick

I didn‘t understand what I was reading, most of the time, but the phrasing & individual images were enough to keep me puzzling through these poems.

“My head is a box full of boxes.
The walls taste like strawberries, go on, lick them.
I take a pinch of sadness in my soup.”

Picked this up on a whim, as recommended by the Whichbook site using the sliders to ask for something “funny, beautiful & unusual.” I‘d say that‘s what I got.

Lindy Check out the Whichbook book recommendation generator here: http://www.openingthebook.com/whichbook/ 6y
emilyhaldi Sounds quirky! 6y
Lindy @emilyhaldi Quirky is not exactly how I would characterize this, because it seems to come from a painful place. Bizarre might be a better description. 6y
44 likes3 comments
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Lindy
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The full moon keeps trying to bathe me.

#poetry #IdontunderstanditbutIlikeit

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Lindy
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Damien stores his jogging shoes in the freezer overnight, says it keeps him on his toes.

#poetry

LeahBergen That mask art is amazing. 6y
Crystalblu So fantastic! 6y
Lindy @LeahBergen @Crystalblu Google Brian Jungen to see more of his wonderful art. 👍 6y
35 likes3 comments
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Lindy
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Presents
Fire on the marble steps. The drunken dinner-lady, flying mashed potato. The kiss of a wasp. The poisoned marshmallow. The speed of a parked car. The smash of a nose against a glass door;
all this I give to you.
For myself, I keep the cliff top. Those long salty days, shock still, knowing that a thousand feet below
lie dangerous, outstretched, arms. The time before the jump, the best place to stay.

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Lindy
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But, for a second, just imagine that this bar
is crammed to the rafters with horny
octopuses,
and they embrace you gently, and
they have eight arms.

#strange #poetry

(Internet photo, T-Rex Cafe, Orlando FL)

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Lindy
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There you were. Hands & knees on carpet, searching for the udders. I said: You can‘t milk a table. You said Why? - made me think for a very long time. ‘Because it can‘t have babies,‘ I resolved - until you mentioned the middle-aged kitchen table, the student writing table, the wide-eyed blinking bedside table, the battered, over the hill, under the stairs table. All this wood to feed. These starving desks. I had to agree. Tables must have udders.

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