I totally judged this book by its cover and title and was surprised that it was a collection of essays and interviews. I did a lot of skimming but did enjoy the chapters that I read in full and the whole concept.
I totally judged this book by its cover and title and was surprised that it was a collection of essays and interviews. I did a lot of skimming but did enjoy the chapters that I read in full and the whole concept.
I really loved this book. It centers the voices of marginalized groups in an exploration of and case for being pleasure-driven. I've posted several quotes from it and could have posted many more, as it is often so eloquent and opened my eyes in many ways. I was having a high-anxiety day, and this book's urging to start genuinely caring for myself and prioritizing my pleasure led me to bake cookies, a process I find meditative and calming. ❤
I saw Birds of Prey, and there is so much about it that is exceptional (so clearly made by women--the wardrobe, the hair tie sharing, all of the things), but one thing I haven't heard enough about is the love between Harley Quinn and her egg sandwich. I've never seen myself represented in a love story the way I saw myself in that. Sometimes the most radical pleasure is finding love in a cheesy, bacony, eggy delight. #yesiweptaboutthesandwich2x 🍳
"In general, I am a high-functioning depressive person...I have come to believe this is a part of my magic, that I dance with darkness and respect it. I know what it is to need therapy, medicate myself, not be able to get out of bed, and not want to live. And while it isn't easy, it makes me feel like I can see things whole, and whatever joy I have is grounded in the miraculous and tragic dual nature of the real world." That's quite a footnote.
"It has been said before but it's always relevant: no is a complete sentence...We must remember that our socialized aversion to no, particularly in capitalist countries, is strategic for those who aim to hold power over us. If we are made to feel uncomfortable saying no, then we will say yes to anyone and anything that tries to sell us shit. We must remember that we are learning to say no as we recover from patriarchy, capitalism, racism."
The instant your mind begins to move in any direction of desire, you can type your longing into a search bar and watch your fantasy or something close to it. Your imagination isn't really needed. And perhaps that would be fine if the top searches were: woman on top of someone she could never identify as a family member, strapped women taking tender tushes, grown up legal-aged professionals of all genders in hot consensual antiracist role play.
"But 'money can't buy you happiness,' right? Like fuck it can't...Money buys protection, time off, privacy, and nice, pretty shit. Money also buys food, housing, and health care. Getting paid enough to meet our needs--and more--feels good. I'm not romanticizing the sex industry, I know it has risks; I'm just not going to romanticize economic deprivation in the name of being a 'good girl' either...you know what feels amazing? Surviving capitalism."
"Folks who are rooted in sensing and seeking pleasure, and bring that energy into their work and relationships, are shining a light for others--there is another path that isn't full of stress, self-doubt, pain, victimization, and suffering. There is a path in which everything is learning, playing, practicing, doing things anew."
I didn‘t hate this book, but it‘s problematic. It‘s a hodgepodge of essays, interviews, poems, and art, including an “interview” with a sex toy. It says its focus is on pleasure in all forms, food, art, clothing, etc, but it primarily focuses on sex, with or without a partner. And in the same breath as talking about harm reduction, it advocates drug use, including mushrooms and ecstasy, as spiritual detox. Had potential but missed the mark.