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Odd Girl Out
Odd Girl Out: An autistic woman in a neurotypical world | Laura James
14 posts | 13 read | 35 to read
What do you do when you wake up in your mid-forties and realize you've been living a lie your whole life? Do you tell? Or do you keep it to yourself? Laura James found out that she was autistic as an adult, after she had forged a career for herself, married twice and raised four children. Odd Girl Out tracks the year of Laura's life after she receives a definitive diagnosis from her doctor, as she learns that 'different' doesn't need to mean 'less' and how there is a place for all of us, and it's never too late to find it. Laura draws on her professional and personal experiences and reflects on her life in the light of her diagnosis, which for her explains some of her differences; why, as a child, she felt happier spinning in circles than standing still and why she has always found it difficult to work in places with a lot of ambient noise. Although this is a personal story, the book has a wider focus too, exploring reasons for the lower rate of diagnosed autism in women and a wide range of topics including eating disorders and autism, marriage and motherhood. This memoir gives a timely account from a woman negotiating the autistic spectrum, from a poignant and personal perspective.
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trudderrs
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Pickpick

Absolutely brilliant

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quietlycuriouskate
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Pickpick

I've seen some reviews (not Litsy!) reflecting a wider societal trend where, if a woman seeks to do something extraordinary, she's required to "do it for" or represent all women. That's an unfair burden to place on anyone! This is LJ's memoir: it's personal.
I greatly appreciated her candour, especially in discussing the ways in which her anxiety, 'special interests' and routines impact upon her life and put strain on her marriage. I needed this.

quietlycuriouskate LJ is a woman of relative privilege (there's mention of a Harley Street doctor and a private members club and she has what she calls a "plummy voice"): I'm inclined to judge myself less harshly, then, as a council-house kid, for pushing 50 before it occurs what's likely been going on for me all these years. She has my gratitude for that. 3y
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rockpools
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Pickpick

A big old resounding pick for being the book I needed to read this week. I‘m trying to understand what a friend is going through/how to support her, as she goes for diagnostic tests. So far we‘ve established that her view & my view of what autism means are light years apart.

Laura James was 45, a successful journalist, wife and mother of 4 adult children, when she was diagnosed with autism. In this memoir, she looks at her diagnosis and the

rockpools readjustment that came after, as well as looking back on her childhood and younger years. She talks to doctors and researchers, bringing us along on the journey as she figures out what this means. She‘s also remarkably honest about her relationship with her husband Tim.

Well-told, interesting and very readable. I rattled through this in 3 days.
3y
squirrelbrain Glad you found a book that helped and hope it helps you to support your friend too. 3y
CarolynM For what it's worth, I don't think you should let a diagnosis of autism define you. It helps explain some things but it's only one part of a whole personality. It is not necessarily a disability. My son is on the spectrum & although I've not been diagnosed I score pretty high on the tests. I hope your friend finds the outcome of the process helpful to her however it goes. You are clearly a good friend & your ongoing acceptance will be invaluable. 3y
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Magpiegem This sounds interesting. My little boy is autistic, amongst other things, his needs are quite complex, I‘m a few years in now and realising just how helpful it is when friends and family are interested in his experience of the world through his eyes and how they can support him. It‘s always worth remembering though- when you‘ve met one autistic person... you‘ve met one autistic person. The word spectrum is right! 3y
rockpools @squirrelbrain Thanks Helen - I think I‘ll be making my way through a few on the lists you sent. 3y
rockpools @CarolynM Thanks Carolyn, that‘s helpful 😘 3y
rockpools @Magpiegem 😊 Thanks Gemma. And yes, I‘m straight onto my next read to get a range of experiences. 3y
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Christine
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I don‘t read as many books about autism as a mom of a kid on the spectrum probably should. But I‘d like to more regularly read books BY people with autism, because - besides being inherently important because #ownvoices - they tend to have the tone and perspectives that I find most valuable. This is a great one - the memoir of a brilliant, successful journalist diagnosed as an adult. Insightful, well-written, and entertaining.

riversong153 Nice cover! 5y
Christine @riversong153 Agreed! 🙂 5y
Owlizabeth I‘ve got two boys on the spectrum and I‘m always looking for #ownvoices books - stacked!! 5y
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rjsthumbelina
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As someone who works daily with kids on the Autism spectrum, I found her account of the ways that her Autism affects her life to be so interesting and eye-opening. I particularly loved how she found coping strategies as an adult learning to put a name to some of the challenges that she faced her entire life. This memoir is super relatable and inviting.

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rjsthumbelina
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❤️? "Books are my greatest pleasure." Me too.

I relate to this bc sometimes a good book can silence my anxiety.

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rjsthumbelina
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It's so cool that she has Ehlers-Danlos! I have this joint condition, and it can be debilitating at times, and it's so frustrating bc no one has any idea what it is. I love reading about someone else that has this

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rjsthumbelina
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I love her descriptions of her own emotions! So interesting to read about how people with different conditions see things in a different light! (The narrator is an adult who has been recently diagnosed with Autism)

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Well-ReadNeck
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AmyLarge
Pickpick

Laura James speaks with clarity and vigour about diagnosis with autism during adulthood. Her passion for facts is evident, with snippets from a range of specialists and professionals used to help illustrate the challenges faced by a woman who has fought to seem neuro typical. When Laura realises that judging herself by living a neuro typical life is not how she wants to live, it is an inspirational finale to a interesting book.

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Well-ReadNeck
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Laura James is a wonderful writer and I breezed through this thought-provoking memoir. There is so much to think about and discuss here that I‘m passing along my library book to a friend so that we can talk about it!! @Redheadreading

Reviewsbylola Omg gotta read this! 7y
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knotmagick
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Reading is hard work.

#littenkittens

ReadingSusan So cute!! 😻😻 7y
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moarbookspleaze
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Today‘s book mail.

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