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South of Forgiveness
South of Forgiveness: A True Story of Rape and Responsibility | Elva Thordis, Stranger Tom
11 posts | 8 read | 1 reading | 13 to read
One ordinary spring morning in Reykjavik, Iceland, Thordis Elva kisses her son and partner goodbye before boarding a plane to do a remarkable thing: fly seven thousand miles to South Africa to confront the man who raped her when she was just sixteen. Meanwhile, in Sydney, Australia, Tom Stranger nervously embarks on an equally life-changing journey to meet Thordis, wondering whether he is worthy of this milestone. After exchanging hundreds of searingly honest emails over eight years, Thordis and Tom decided it was time to speak face to face. Coming from opposite sides of the globe, they meet in the middle, in Cape Town, South Africa, a country that is no stranger to violence and the healing power of forgiveness. South of Forgiveness is an unprecedented collaboration between a survivor and a perpetrator, each equally committed to exploring the darkest moment of their lives. It is a true story about being bent but not broken, facing fear with courage, and finding hope even in the most wounded of places. Personable, accessible, and compelling, South of Forgiveness is an intense and refreshing look at a gendered violence, rape culture, personal responsibility, and the effect that patriarchal cultures have on both men and women.
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MrsMalaprop
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2. Reading IS my superpower 📚📚📚💪.
3. Pisces.
4. My sister is flying in from interstate 💕. We‘ll be visiting our mum, then heading out for cocktails & dinner with friends🍸🍽😍.
5. @Rissreads @The_Real_Nani 👋👋

#friyayintro @howjessreads

Thanks for the tag @Lizpixie

The_Real_Nani Sounds like a great weekend!! 5y
Rissreads Sorry Serena, the weekends over! 5y
36 likes2 comments
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tome.fries
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Pickpick

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
WARNING: this book discusses sexual violence

A truly unique and inspiring story and one that much more fit my experiences than any other book on the topic. It takes a lot to forgive, & it's not for everyone, but for those who can find reconciliation, it can be transformative. The amount of self-awareness and accountability in this book is astounding. It is the first book on rape that has given me, a violence prevention educator, hope.

7 likes1 stack add
review
Rissreads
South of Forgiveness | Thordis Elva, Tom Strange
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Pickpick

Mahatma Gandhi once said that the weak could never forgive. That forgiveness was an attribute of the strong. (pg 301)
This quote sums up the overall theme of this book written by both the rapist and the victim. It is a raw and powerful story which I found very moving and so relevant and so remarkable. Thanks for the recommendation @MrsMalaprop I know this book is going to sit with me for quite a while.

Kalalalatja Such a powerful book! 5y
MrsMalaprop 👏 I messaged her in appreciation on Insta and she responded. #fangirl 😍 5y
Crazeedi Did you see my post to you? I got your lovely package and posted on my feed! @Rissreads 5y
Rissreads @Crazeedi no I didn‘t I will look now. 👍 5y
29 likes4 comments
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MrsMalaprop
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Pickpick

CN: sexual assault

A very moving and unique perspective on sexual assault and the aftermath. Powerful stuff.

I watched the Tedtalk immediately on finishing the book. Wow. Thordis is an amazing human being.

https://www.ted.com/talks/thordis_elva_tom_stranger_our_story_of_rape_and_reconc...

Kalalalatja She really is awesome 🙌 5y
Anna40 The book is written by victim and rapist? Does he talk about the rape? 5y
MrsMalaprop @anna40 Yes. He owns up to what he did. They each wrote sections of the book & both speak in the Ted-talk. 5y
Anna40 They both speak? Together? Wow. 5y
42 likes4 comments
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MrsMalaprop
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CN: sexual assault

Thordis says this to Tom, her ex-boyfriend and rapist. This is an important book. I‘m so glad to be finally reading it.

#currentlyreading

45 likes1 stack add
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MrsMalaprop
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#Currentlyreading I decided to start this today.

I have been following Thordis on Instagram for about 18 months. She does daily stories and I have loved following her amazing journey of pregnancy with extremely premature twins who are now almost 1 year old 👶👶❤️❤️!

I started following her because of this book and her feminist activism. So I think it‘s about time I read it. I‘m bracing myself for a tough read.

Kalalalatja Hope you find it interesting and insightful - I did! 5y
Rissreads I just ordered it, I hope it doesn‘t take too long to get here! 5y
51 likes1 stack add2 comments
review
Kalalalatja
South of Forgiveness | Thordis Elva, Tom Strange
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Pickpick

What Thordis Elva has done, I‘m not sure I would be able to do, if I were in her shoes, but I admire her for it. Contacting the man who raped her, trying to forgive him and eventually meeting up with him in a foreign country to get to a place of acceptance, forgiveness and understanding, are beyond what most survivors would do. But Elva did it. And wrote a book with her perpetraitor. And it is a great book.

Mdargusch I don‘t think I could ever do that. Wow. 5y
Kalalalatja @Mdargusch me neither, but I really admire her strength. And it helps that Tom, her perpetraitor, is actually sorry and repents what he has done. His thoughts and reflections were interesting! 5y
MrsMalaprop I have just started this today. And already I am like, “Wow”. 5y
71 likes3 comments
blurb
Kalalalatja
South of Forgiveness | Thordis Elva, Tom Strange
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I‘m on Easter break from today till Tuesday, and I‘m excited! I have been #audiocleaning and #audiobaking with the tagged book, and now I‘m ready to relax with one of the raspberry slices above, and start a new book 👌

Emilymdxn Those look amazing! 5y
mreads OMG those look delicious 5y
mabell Yum! 😍 Are they like sugar cookie sandwiches with a raspberry filling? 5y
See All 16 Comments
Crazeedi Those cookies look yummy!! 5y
MrsMalaprop I love Thordis Elva ❤️❤️❤️ & avidly follow her stories on Instagram. I have her book, but know I need to be in the right place to read it... 5y
Caroline2 Yummy 😋 5y
Kalalalatja @mabell more like shortcrust and then with raspberry jam in the middle and icing on top. So simple, but soooo gooooood 😋 5y
tammysue All looks yummy 😋 ! 5y
batsy Yummy! 5y
wanderinglynn Those look delicious! 😋 5y
Kalalalatja @Emilymdxn @mreads @Crazeedi @Caroline2 @whatshesreadingnow @batsy @wanderinglynn I really have to stop myself from eating them all at once 😍 5y
Kalalalatja @MrsMalaprop thanks for the tip, I have to find her on instagram now! and it is a sad and tough read, but I found it really positive as well. 5y
LeahBergen Yum! 5y
mabell They definitely sound delicious! 5y
ephemeralwaltz Yummy!! 5y
minkyb That looks like the PERFECT baked goodie!
5y
98 likes1 stack add16 comments
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Sydneyeditor1
South of Forgiveness | Thordis Elva, Tom Strange
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South of Forgiveness is a memoir from a survivor if rape and her rapist. Powerful, confronting reading. Just found this quote on rape and thought it so true

7 likes1 stack add