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You Exist Too Much
You Exist Too Much | Zaina Arafat
21 posts | 24 read | 34 to read
For fans of Garth Greenwell and Weike Wang, a startling debut novel of desire and doubleness following the life of a young Palestinian-American woman caught between cultural, religious, and sexual identities
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bookishbitch
You Exist Too Much | Zaina Arafat
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I really enjoyed the writing. The main character flips back and forth between memories of her childhood and parents to her past relationships and her role in them, both good and bad. It is a personal journey of growth and recognition of her destructive behaviors and what it took to change them. It was also a look at the possible role her parents held in that as well. I enjoyed the characters insight at the end about her mother. #freepalestine

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Liz_M
You Exist Too Much | Zaina Arafat
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Pickpick

A typical coming-of-age story with an atypical narrator. A bisexual Palestinian-American, she is unable to please her mother. An outsider both in America and during summers spent in the Middle East, she sabotages mundane relationships by pursuing idealistic, impossible ones. A breakup sends her into treatment, which doesn‘t solve her “love-addition” but interrupts her behavior enough to (eventually) make choices rather than following compulsions.

Liz_M The novel reminds me a lot of the tagged – it‘s a counterpoint to that novel‘s coming-of-age daughter-of-Turkish-immigrants protagonist that was too much in her head, overthinking and philosophizing and not making emotional/physical connections. 10mo
Liz_M 3⭐ #TBRtarot : Book that starts with “You.“
#Bert #catsoflitsy
(edited) 10mo
rubyslippersreads 😻😻😻 10mo
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BarbaraBB Lovely photo Bert! 10mo
Bookwormjillk 😻😻😻 10mo
dabbe 🖤🐾🖤 10mo
Liz_M @rubyslippersreads, @BarbaraBB, @Bookwormjillk Bert appreciates all the admiration (he can never get enough). 10mo
40 likes1 stack add7 comments
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LadyCait84
You Exist Too Much | Zaina Arafat
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Pickpick

It‘s an exploration of the protagonist‘s traumas and desires, and the relationship between them. I found it to be quite sad — perhaps more than was intended — but was moved by both its raw honesty and surprising optimism.

43 likes1 stack add
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Mariasimon
You Exist Too Much | Zaina Arafat
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Pickpick

Interesting concept, I‘ve never heard of a book like this before. New topic of love addiction discussed. Sweet ending

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bekakins
You Exist Too Much | Zaina Arafat
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Pickpick

I really enjoyed this meandering novel. Very interesting! And my #bookspinbingo board!

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Sydneypaige
You Exist Too Much | Zaina Arafat
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Sexy in an unconventional way with a very wandering story telling narrator. The relationships, and the narrator‘s relationship to romantic relationships, are both full of compelling drama and frustration as the reader.

4 likes1 stack add
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Abailliekaras
You Exist Too Much | Zaina Arafat
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Bailedbailed

I love the premise (& cover): a Palestinian American gay woman navigating her relationships & past trauma in Brooklyn & the Middle East. Honest & authentic sense of family & place. But the narrator was self-absorbed & her mother so unlikeable that I struggled to care about them. The story seemed to revolve around her ‘love addiction‘ which lost me completely & scenes at her rehab seemed pointless. She‘s mixed up but the bratty tone put me off.

Hooked_on_books That premise does sound amazing. What a disappointment! But that cover! 😍 3y
Abailliekaras @Hooked_on_books I know! It‘s had some positive reviews so might be worth checking out. 3y
32 likes1 stack add2 comments
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Augustdana
You Exist Too Much | Zaina Arafat
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I have not read a single page in weeks and thank goodness there was no one waiting for this book from the library. I renewed it for another three weeks and we‘ll see what the future holds. I‘m optimistic.

readordierachel 🤞🏼 3y
18 likes1 stack add1 comment
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emmaturi
You Exist Too Much | Zaina Arafat
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Pickpick

The main character is an unnamed young Palestinian American woman and we see her life in present day in the States and in flashbacks on holiday in the Middle East. She falls for unattainable men and women, and decides to go for help at a centre for love addiction. She has relationship problems with her mother. It was an interesting read! #books

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Wanders.In.Stories
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Pickpick

This book is about a relatable woman dealing openly with her self made pitfalls and complications...I like her...she brings the reader through her ups and downs, her travels between her two homelands (the Middle-east and US), her loves (real and imagined) her gorgeous, hard to handle mother, rehab, and finally, her direction moves towards her normalcy. This book is different and cool.

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Wanders.In.Stories
You Exist Too Much | Zaina Arafat
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“Yet that is the realm, the realm of my mother, in which I consistently forget how to survive”

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Wanders.In.Stories
You Exist Too Much | Zaina Arafat
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“The notion that everyone will eventually cease to exist brings me great comfort and temporary courage. Often I try to visualize the coming apocalypse: barren tree branches, scrap metal, tumbleweed. As the images appear in my head, a wave begins to curl in my stomach. Together they propel me forward, and I act.
Right then, it wasn‘t working.”
Omg I love this writer!

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Melismatic
You Exist Too Much | Zaina Arafat
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Mehso-so

I hovered over pan for awhile bc the protagonist makes the same mistakes over and over and never seems to learn from them. The saving grace was the interesting cultural juxtaposition with her Palestinian immigrant mother. But overall, not my fave.

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SincerelyWinona
You Exist Too Much | Zaina Arafat
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Bailedbailed

I lasted exactly 4 minutes and 27 seconds before I deleted the audiobook. The narrator is British/Indian/Australian... and it‘s horribly jarring to hear her butcher Arabic as she‘s supposed to be narrating a Palestinian American character. I still want to read the book seeing as I identify as a queer woman and have lived in Palestine and walked the very streets this book opened in, but I couldn‘t palate this narration a second longer.

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Cinfhen
You Exist Too Much | Zaina Arafat
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Mehso-so

You know that old adage, write what you know....well, I‘m willing to bet all my savings that this fiction debut is 💯 autobiographical. The writing was very simplistic & the author‘s newbie roots & age were obvious. I dislike when authors drop brand names onto the pages (which add zero value to the narrative) & this book was full of “branding”. It was interesting to read about the Arab culture and to hear another perspective👇🏽

Cinfhen although I will admit to some VERY HEAVY eye rolls. I‘m a firm believer that there are more than 2 sides to every issue & nothing is black & white yet Zania Arafat ONLY offers one look at the Israeli /Palestinian issue. I find that disingenuous but I respect that the author is entitled to write her own truths. 4y
BarbaraBB Great review nevertheless. I‘ll pass on the book though! 4y
Reviewsbylola Gonna pass but love the cover! 4y
Abailliekaras I bailed on this one. 3y
Cinfhen Yea @Abailliekaras this one didn‘t land well with me….what do you think caused you to bail?? 3y
89 likes5 comments
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Cinfhen
You Exist Too Much | Zaina Arafat
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#Hoopla rocks 🙌🏻💕SO MANY new titles and lots of #OwnVoices #LGBTQ

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TaraTLK
You Exist Too Much | Zaina Arafat
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This book is so hard to describe because it's about someone reckoning with toxic relationship patterns which I confess, is not a thing I particularly seek in fiction. But the prose is amazing and there are moments of such incredible insight.
Content note: abusive relationships, and some discussion of disordered eating.

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PMMREADS
You Exist Too Much | Zaina Arafat
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Pickpick

I‘d recommend this book. This book is a book about a mother and daughter relationship. It‘s a book about culture. It‘s a book about mental health and love. Each character has depth and their own personal story and history. #youexisttoomuch #zainaarafat check it out. It‘s a book that you probably won‘t finish in one sitting; as the story drags. It‘s worth reading.

10 likes1 stack add
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BookNAround
You Exist Too Much | Zaina Arafat
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A day late for Pride Month but any month is a good month to start this one. I‘ve heard really good things about it so it‘s my next read.

57 likes3 stack adds
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bourne.shell
You Exist Too Much | Zaina Arafat
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Pickpick

Read this in two days. While it's not really my genre. What does a straight, white, middle-aged male have in common with a young gay Palestinian woman? But in her effort to deal with childhood trauma, cultural baggage, and inner self-doubt. There was something in her pain and deep insecurities that resonated with me. So flawed and human. Yelling at her by the end of the book! I just want you to be happy! I can't bear to see her have anymore pain.

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ReadingEnvy
You Exist Too Much | Zaina Arafat
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Pickpick

The background of the novel is a woman born to Palestinian parents, who were forced to relocate in 1967. They have family in Lebanon, West Bank, and Jordans, but live in America. Her parents had a volatile relationship and her mother has often treated her like competition or an inconvenience, telling her "You exist too much" when she responds emotionally, especially when she starts trying to come out to her.⤵️

ReadingEnvy .
But this is not a family saga. It's more like a recovery novel. At the start of the novel, a relationship between the MC and her girlfriend Anna has just ended and it's definitely her fault. She's been sleeping with randos at the bar where she DJs and carrying on with a married professor while claiming to be monogamous; she decides to check in to a facility for addiction...love addiction.⤵️
4y
ReadingEnvy I was a bit surprised at this as the majority of the story, because the very first scene of the novel, where she gets in trouble for exposing her ankles in Bethlehem, made me think it would be a different type of story.⤵️
4y
ReadingEnvy I was more interested in the parts about her mother, honestly, what her life started as and what happened in the war, the distributed nature of her family, the strangeness of her parents' marriage and how violence was the only form of attention - the author was making the connection between that upbringing and the MC's behavior but I think the piece that was missing is that I'm not sure the MC ever does. ⤵️ 4y
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ReadingEnvy This makes it feel like the novel is a snapshot of the story but not the entire story, and I think that's okay, but somehow not as satisfying as I would have liked.⤵️ 4y
ReadingEnvy This is more of a 3.5 - between a like and a so-so. Some reviewers take the love addiction as the author saying bisexuals are all love addicts and to her credit I don't think she was saying that. I saw the love addiction as an excuse the way famous people go off to rehab when they make public mistakes. But ymmv. 4y
vivastory I'm finding this collage style design that's really prevalent interesting. I'm not sure what the industry term for this specific aesthetic is but it keeps popping up. 4y
ReadingEnvy @vivastory you mean the cover art (or the collage storytelling style?) 4y
vivastory The cover art . Same style as Brit Bennett, Woodson's Red at the Bone etc 4y
ReadingEnvy Yeah what is that, screenprinting? I don't know art terms very well. 4y
vivastory I'm not sure what the official term is, I think of it as Romare Bearden style. I like it more than some of the other recent design trends. 4y
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