Welcome to Litsy!

...Trojan-horse style, silence as its true intent. That the opposite of slut is not virtue but voice.

So I've written what happened, exactly as I remember...

"Lacy" said my mother "where you raped?" "Only in my mouth",this heartbreaking answer is only the beginning of what happened to Lacy when attending St Paul's school.When she was only 15 two older boys raped her,she doesn't have the vocabulary for what happened.Is it rape if it was my mouth?Is it rape if I didn't scream?She gets STD,she doesn't understand it because the school hides the diagnosis,she thinks it's God's punishment for what she did.⬇️

This is a powerful memoir about a sexual assault at a private New England boarding school. The writing is spectacular; the story is devastating especially in the way that the perpetrators were protected and the victim was villified. #14books14weeks2023
@TheHeartlandBookFairy

A must-read! It took me forever to finish it since I get easily distracted by other books, but Lacy‘s story is one that I will never forget.

Would recommend this to people who enjoyed Makkai's I have Some Questions for you. This is a nonfiction memoir about Crawford's time at a boarding school, her sexual assault and how she got through school after. Also a bit about how the school covered up her case, and many others until it all came crumbling down 25 years after Crawford 's assault.
The author is a journalist, she writes well and the pace is quick and highly readable.

I have created a very ambitious TBR for the month of May, and this was high on the list. Only about 10 pages in and already my heart is breaking.

Thought provoking, emotional, anger inducing. #ThingsInCommon

I have so many feelings while I read this book. Feelings on my past and feelings on my daughters future.

Truth.

Starting this. Glad I grabbed it on my way put the door, because my Kindle died and I don't have the charger with me.

"First, they refused to believe me. And they shamed me. Then they silenced me... I say it is better to be a slut than to be silent. I believe, in fact, that the slur slut carries within it, Trojan- horse style, silence as it's true intent. That the opposite of slut is not virtue but voice."

^ Sums up the memoir better than I could.

You‘d be surprised what a kid can find it unimaginable to say 💔
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First, they refused to believe me. Then they shamed me. Then they silenced me. On balance, if this is a girl‘s trajectory from dignity to disappearance, I say it is better to be a slut than to be silent 🗣

I'm sort of in between on this one. On one hand, her story / experience was horrifying. On the other hand, it took me a while to get into this because it was bogged down with minutia. I can't imagine if this was my child or sister or best friend that went through this. And the worst part is that it isn't even that unusual. Ugh. People should read this despite its flaws.

If it weren‘t for the sexual assault, this would read like a regular boarding school memoir. In fact, a quite bit of it reads typically of that. However, per the title, the heinousness is in the coverup, by the school and later by private and state attorneys. Not to discount her experience of the assault, but what makes her story unique is the systemic suppression of victims over time and the tampering with private medical records. #audiobook

Squarely in my wheelhouse. I love memoirs and this is very well done and expansive. I‘m impressed by the way the author places readers right in the action of her New English boarding school experience, which happened decades before she wrote this. It felt very raw and honest. I‘m sure many of the details shared were incredibly painful. Crawford was sexually assaulted at a very young age which affected her career at St Paul‘s School.

As a survivor of sexual assault, I've never read a book & felt so understood. I marked & noted many passages that felt like she put into words the feelings I've carried for years. It's a fantastic memoir- as much as any writing on this topic can be. This occurred not so many years ago & exemplifies the way the full force of a system can be manipulated to suppress the voices of women & girls. It's a painful example of how far we still have to go.

A powerful and emotional memoir by a woman who was sexually assaulted at her elite boarding school at the age of 15 —and was then assaulted by the school itself, which slandered her reputation in an attempt to bury the crime. This book angered me in a visceral way. Kudos to Lacy Crawford for having the courage to speak out about what St. Paul‘s School did to her.

⭐️⭐️The author was so come of and distant throughout the book that it did not seem like she was telling her story. Toward the end of the book the title finally began to fit the story. It is sad that this took place and that it still takes place today.

Wow this was good. The author reads on audio and I couldn‘t stop listening.

Excellent memoir about a topic that is, unfortunately, far too common. I was impressed with the author‘s ability to tap into her 15-year old self and honestly convey her feelings. I was worried that I would be angry the whole time I was reading this book, but instead I wound up feeling great empathy with the author.

Thanks to partner Libro.fm for the ALC of Lacy Crawford's Notes on a Silencing.⠀
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This book. Wow. Read by the author, the audiobook of Notes on a Silencing is a powerful, vulnerable, heart-breaking account of Lacy Crawford's sexual assault by two classmates. At fifteen, Lacy is a student at an exclusive board school when she's raped. The inevitable trauma is exacerbated by the fact that Lacy, held back by her own innocence and her fear, ⬇️

This is a soft pick for her courage in writing and publishing this. I considered bailing several times because reading it made me viscerally uncomfortable. But that is kind of the point of a work like this, isn‘t it? Structurally I thought it could have been a bit more focused but that did not lessen its impact. Will sicken and sadden and enrage you. #BOTM

Its hard to give words on a memoir about sexual assault at a prestigious school, but the best I can say is that it‘s written like a campus novel, and it‘s horrifying and lovely and so fucking infuriating too. It got me fired up!

Lacy Crawford was sexually assaulted by two 18 year olds when she was 15 at an exclusive boarding school. The school went to every possible length thereafter to silence her, from threats to violations of her privacy. She spends a bit too long setting the stage, so really this should be whittled down by about 50 pages, but the last 100+ pages are superb. An important addition to the #Metoo pantheon.

All of my library books that have the most other holds and therefore need to be read first are big bummers/heavy subjects. I‘ve been looking forward to this book for awhile but have found my stack a bit intimidating today.

Book 106 A memoir about rape culture-how being abused negatively impacted a young girl's perception of herself, as well as her peers', family's, and teachers' perceptions of her. Mostly about the lengths a prestigious boarding school will go to to cover up sexual violence on their campus. Really dry writing. It should have been impactful, but lacked focus. I almost didn't finish reading it.

First time ever getting 3 In my BOTM box...not sure how my hubby felt seeing a bigger box🤷‍♀️🤣

This book is a reminder (as if we need one) that the patriarchy is alive and well. Lacy is the victim of a sexual assault as a 14 year old student at an elite boarding school. The story is not a new one - people in power covering up abuses against women to save powerful men - but it is an important one and one that must have been difficult to tell. Hoping for a future where victims are believed and perpetrators are held responsible.

This will be triggering for some. Local author from San Diego, CA gives a raw account of her sexual assault by two boys at an elite private school in New England in 1990. From the school covering up the incident to her being victim blamed, this is a precursor to the #metoo movement of the Kavabaugh-Cosby-Weinstein-Epstein era and the need for social change. Emotionally packed, this will leave you angry but informed.

Adding on to my last post with more July #BOTM picks (still not completely sure what's a "pick" vs an "extra").

I've edited to include the last spoiler, so between this and my last post I think that's all for picks and extras!