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I Thought It Was Just Me: Women Reclaiming Power and Courage in a Culture of Shame
I Thought It Was Just Me: Women Reclaiming Power and Courage in a Culture of Shame | Bren Brown
An affirming, revealing examination of the painful effects of shame?with new, powerful strategies that promise to transform a woman's abilitiy to love, parent, work, and build relationships. Shame manifests itself in many ways. Addiction, perfectionism, fear and blame are just a few of the outward signs that Dr. Bren? Brown discovered in her 6-year study of shame's effects on women. While shame is generally thought of as an emotion sequestered in the shadows of our psyches, "I Thought It Was Just Me" demonstrates the ways in which it is actually present in the most mundane and visible aspects of our lives?from our mental and physical health and body image to our relationships with our partners, our kids, our friends, our money, and our work. After talking to hundreds of women and therapists, Dr. Brown is able to illuminate the myriad shaming influences that dominate our culture and explain why we are all vulnerable to shame. We live in a culture that tells us we must reject our bodies, reject our authentic stories, and ultimately reject our true selves in order to fit in and be accepted. Outlining an empowering new approach that dispels judgment and awakens us to the genuine acceptance of ourselves and others, "I Thought It Was Just Me" begins a crucial new dialogue of hope. Through potent personal narratives and examples from real women, Brown identifies and explains four key elements that allow women to transform their shame into courage, compassion and connection. Shame is a dark and sad place in which to live a life, keeping us from connecting fully to our loved ones and being the women we were meant to be. But learning how to understand shame's influence and move through it toward full acceptance of ourselves and others takes away much of shame's power to harm. It's not just you, you?re not alone, and if you fight the daily battle of feeling like you are?somehow?just not ?enough, ? you owe it to yourself to read this book and discover your infinite possibilities as a human being.
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Esin
Pickpick

Unexpectedly quirky and schema-shifting. I was forced to be self-reflective and valued my findings

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fandom_hellspawn99
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17 likes1 stack add
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MommyWantsToReadHerBook
Pickpick

Such a good book! Highly recommended.

Trashcanman 🤗❤🤗 4y
37 likes1 comment
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MommyWantsToReadHerBook
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I'm really getting a lot from this book! So much great stuff that is helping me understand my own shame patterns much better.

38 likes1 stack add
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Hestapleton
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Pickpick

A powerful book about the prevalence of shame in our lives and how to build resilience, making us more empathetic and connected to others. An absolutely difficult and challenging read, by extraordinarily valuable. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Amandajoy I finished another of her books this week & now I want to read everything she‘s written. 5y
Hestapleton @Amandajoy The Gifts of Imperfection was the first book I read by her too! I found that book helpful, but (at least for me) I Thought It Was Just Me helped me get to the ROOT of my perfectionism more. And now I want to go back to The Gifts of Imperfection with that knowledge in store! 5y
70 likes7 stack adds2 comments
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I_Like_Big_Books
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Pickpick

4/5 ⭐️ Brené rocks!

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brandybear22
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Perception and reality aren‘t defined as easily as a cliche rolled off the tongue, accepted without question, from thee therapist, or other such truthsayers...

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kgriffith
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Mehso-so

I‘m sure I would have found this more instructive when it came out, not that the research is dated, but that I‘ve come to a lot of this through my own experience and work over the last decade. Unlike with Rising Strong, I don‘t think I‘ve had a takeaway that I‘ll keep coming back to in my mind, but perhaps. If so, I‘ll consider revising to a pick 🤓
Pictured: I am NOT artistic, but am a sucker for a fancy marker set on sale. These arrived today.

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kgriffith
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I don‘t know how I feel about Brené‘s work being narrated by someone other than her. I don‘t love listening to her, but it feels disingenuous somehow, like a knockoff of a brand or something.

41 likes1 stack add
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brandybear22
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Filling in the blank of what you want to be perceived as versus what you do not want to be perceived as. As a way to recognize shame triggers a.k.a. acknowledging vulnerability. Then comparing how you feel about your unwanted identities versus ideal perceptions.

A bit of a mindf*ck, figuring out all this shame stuff...

jmofo 🖤 it‘s such important work. I wish you well. I‘m still a huge mess about things that I haven‘t seen yet, much less looked at. Thank you for sharing this! 6y
kgriffith I just got this one on audible a couple of days ago as part of their 2/1 credit sale. Seeing as how I decided that letting go of perfectionism is a thing I‘m going to work on in 2019, I suppose I should bump it up the TBR... it‘s so uncomfortable, which is how I guess I know it‘s where I need to go? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 6y
11 likes1 stack add2 comments
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sophierayton
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Pickpick

This has taken me forever to get through. It's not as well written as the later books but the information and sentiment contained within is just as powerful. Brene Brown's work is a gift.

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brandybear22
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"...many believe that the changing definitions of courage mirrors a cultural shift that has diminished the value of women's voices and stories."

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brandybear22
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Oh, thank you. I had somehow forgotten to pet you... please reposition for the 27th time. So sorry my book isn't as comfy as you'd expected. I'll get another.

Suelizbeth 😻😻 Your cat looks just like my Oz. 6y
12 likes1 comment
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Fortifiedbybooks
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Ok, I'm ready to read! #24in48

16 likes1 stack add
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Victoriahoperose
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Mehso-so

I felt like this book was so long. The author could have gotten her message across in less pages and it would have been strong. It just got super repetitive to me and I wondered why she didn‘t spend more time speaking about and researching shame and it‘s effect on men. Interesting message, but could have been portrayed better.

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NikkiLeClair
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Pickpick

Seriously, I adore this woman.
I reread this recently (when I first read it last year I couldn't really focus enough) and was blown away at how well she nailed human behavior, espiecally that of women these days.

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limada
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Still on my journey of self-discovery... Or is it self acceptance? Whatever. Still pushing forward. #lifeisajourney #nomoreshame

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Shaunesay
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The importance of empathy.

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Lindsy
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Sunday morning with Brene

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Lindsy
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Weekend reading. My goal is to finish at least one of these today.

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ErikasMindfulShelf
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Pickpick

I will definitely read more by Brenè Brown. 4 ?

BookBelle84 I've read all of hers and they are all great! 7y
37 likes2 stack adds2 comments
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bookandcat
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Pickpick

I love me some Brené Brown and this read was rewarding but exhausting (because it's book #8 of #readathon and a #ninfiction book and it requires a lot of emotional work because it is about shame and shame resilience). I recommend this book but I'm also listening to her audiobook The Power of Vulnerability and I personally find the audio message more impactful than visually reading it. Incredibly useful information and important for EVERYBODY.

Krissajeldy Brene Brown is great! Book #8?!? That's amazing! I've only finished one and part way through 3 others. 7y
bookandcat @Krissajeldy I'm a speedreader so I work pretty quickly if I give myself time to read. That's awesome you've gotten so much reading done yourself! 7y
20 likes2 comments
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Leelee08
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For today's prompt, I am including books from strong, powerful women who make me feel like I can do anything! #girlfriends! #anditsaugust 💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻😍

MayJasper Good choices 7y
Leelee08 @MayJasper Thank you! 7y
RealLifeReading Yeah! 👍👍 7y
67 likes3 comments
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dariazeoli
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I really like Brené Brown's work. This one is on sale right now!

#kindledeal #recommendsday

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MayginReads
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Pickpick

3⭐ This was the first Brown book I struggled to finish, but I'm glad I did. I definitely needed to dive deeper into shame resilience work. But it's a very trigger book and I was frustrated it wasnt better done to avoid so many triggers. It's one of her early books, so I tried not to compare the quality to later books which are amazing. I'd recommend this if you need a deep dive into shame!

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Shway
Pickpick

What a lovely book from shame researcher Brene Brown. The tone, the cadence, the message were all perfection. Initially when I heard that she conducted 300 interviews for this project I was unimpressed. By the end of the book I understood the magnitude of such a feat. She also has lovely Ted talks where she talks about her research in a very meaningful way. I found myself tearing up during certain sections of this book.

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MayginReads
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Pickpick

I recommend this audiobook for anyone wanting to live a more present, joyful, and wholehearted life. Brene Brown covers everything she has touched on in her books, at least up through Daring Greatly. I'd recommend this even if you've read some of her other works, but just know that she does reuse some stories. But that didn't detract from the audiobook. Go check it out!

There is also an online course with video and this audio on Sounds True.

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MayginReads
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Listening to this gem by Brene Brown while I drive to see friends. Too bad it's not on Litsy 😕

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Bibliogeekery
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❤️

Bambolina_81 Brenè Brown 💖 8y
Yeah_I_Read 🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌 8y
Jess_Read_This 🙌🏼💕🙌🏼💕 I love Brene Brown. 8y
DogMomIrene I can't tell you how many people have recommended Brene Brown to me. Seeing your posted quote from her makes me realize I need to get on this reading goal! 💜 8y
Bibliogeekery @ocdIrene I think you'll love her stuff!! ❤️ 8y
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kPea
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Pickpick

Wow. I am so thankful that I found this book. Life-changing!

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BookBelle84
Pickpick

Brene Brown is a great writer with tips and insights that anyone can use everyday. I love the way her books make me think and give me ideas on how I can improve my life as well as the lives of people around me.

27 likes1 stack add
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BookBelle84
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Starting this one today. I've read all the Brene Brown books in the opposite order.

Cortg Opposite order? I love it 😂 8y
DeborahSmall No!! You're killing me 😂❤️ 8y
35 likes2 comments
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CoffeeK8
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Reading(listening) to this while trying to relax tonight and wait out the results

BookishMarginalia I'm hoping good sense wins... 😳 8y
11 likes2 comments
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maximoffs
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Final part of added to my Kindle today! Ideas/suggestions/feedback appreciated!

Cortg I read this years ago for a book club and loved it. Different. 8y
maximoffs Thanks @Cortg ! 8y
See All 7 Comments
Onioons Kavalier & Clay is amazing! 8y
maximoffs @Onioons I feel like that's a must now! 8y
KVanRead Kavalier and Clay 💜💜💜 8y
eric.small Kavalier and Clay is definitely a must. You will love it, cover to cover. 8y
51 likes7 comments
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Beth.La
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Pickpick

Brown's first book on shame opens up a conversation we need to have about what makes us feel shame, how it affects our lives and relationships, and the steps we can take to become shame resilient.

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heatherspoetlife
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Pickpick

Love it! I actually love all four of the books I've read of hers so far. This one focuses on women and the messages we receive, how it helps to cause shame and what we can do about it. There's also a good explanation of thr difference between guilt and #shame and an intro to her work with men.
This is one of those books that is surprisingly #feminist, but anyone can enjoy it.

Full Review at: http://wp.me/p6D5Ti-2Wq

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heatherspoetlife
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I came across this passage this morning and had to share. I know I have a tendency to look at #bodyimage a little narrowly, but I've also experienced issuss where I hated my body for letting me down. I never thought to relate them. Image was appearance, right?
But image as actually so much bigger than that. An interesting perspective.

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heatherspoetlife
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An interesting thought on #privilege and #racism, #sexism, #hetero-sexism, #classism, #ageism, and #ableism. Probably more. Its not the only thing that perpetuates all these oppressions, but it seems like one that would be holding back people who want to reach out and bridge the gap. What do you think?

BookishFeminist I agree with this. I think feeling shame makes it about you and prevents you from genuinely connecting with other people. An example of this is white guilt- it doesn't really help anyone because it puts the focus on white people's feelings rather than just holding them accountable to do better. I have more complex thoughts on this since it's a topic with a lot of gray area but I agree with this overall sentiment. Love Brene Brown. 8y
WOCreads Yeah the shame thing isn't helpful, especially since apparently we are now supposed to be feeling sorry and guilty too that white straight people have privilege? We need to change the system foremost but yes on a personal level empathy is key and one reason I think reading diversely is so important!😃 8y
BookishFeminist @Ifyoucanreadthis_Bina 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 yes!! It's so destructive for people to feel sorry for having privilege. You can't help it! But you don't have to make a point of it and unlearn things you do from your privilege and share its benefits as best you can. Empathy is the most important like you say & shame undercuts empathy. 8y
heatherspoetlife Its funny that you mention white guilt. The next paragraph actually goes on to explain that exact phenomenon and why it doesn't help anyone. The section I took the quote from covers how someone can empathize instead. 8y
5 likes4 comments
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heatherspoetlife
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This is an interesting observation, especially that she says 'organized by' rather than 'based on'. Any thoughts? #shame and #gender

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heatherspoetlife
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Just started reading this book and had to share. Its just so true and it contributes to so many things we do and don't let our kids do. I know I'm guilty too, but I have to work hard to stop.

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heatherspoetlife
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This just popped up as available at my library! I've been waiting for it forever, I just love all of Dr. Brown's work. I have to finish No Time For Tears before I can dive in, though.

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KellyHerself
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I haven't read anything by Brene Brown. I just watched a few clips of her speaking so I am jumping in with her first book.

BookishFeminist Brene Brown is amazing 👍🏼 8y
LauraJ The title is intriguing. Think it would be a good audiobook? 8y
KellyHerself @LauraJ hmmm. I don't know. I like to highlight passages so I wanted a physical copy. 8y
KellyHerself @BookishFeminist she is amazing ❤️ 8y
63 likes5 stack adds4 comments
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melissajayne
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Received this in the mail

19 likes3 stack adds
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JSW
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This book is so powerful.

LAnneCard Wow. 😳 8y
6 likes1 comment
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JSW
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Shame comes from outside of us- from the messages and expectations of our culture.

Sydsavvy I find it amazing how women are still shamed. We've come so far and yet that little Shame Card gets played. 9y
5 likes1 stack add1 comment