Welcome to Litsy!

Such a fun pride march/festival today! The weather was beautiful, and the crowd was beautiful 🏳️‍🌈 The picture is maybe a quarter of the total marchers. Puppy Cady was very popular 😁

An important read, but not a comfortable one.
There's an unfair comparison going on in my mind, because I read In Transit last month and that felt like both an acknowledgement of where people struggled, but also really welcoming and encouraging. This work felt like there was a lot more focus on fighting against misconceptions, for respect and recognition. 1/?

Oh, look, another damaging facet of toxic masculinity. 🤦🏼‍♂️

Power of language.

reread it this year, easy read, standard work about asexuality
4.5/5

It took me a really long time to finish this, partially because I took a long break. It‘s pretty dense, and several chapters covered some emotionally turbulent topics I wasn‘t prepared to feel right then. Overall an excellent read and many interesting insights. I related to a lot of what was said and filled my copy with sticky tabs marking that and other content. A few times I felt this went off course or reached odd conclusions. #LGBTQIA

😏

This book is great because it‘s not just about the asexual community. It‘s about sex, and the hold it has on a lot of what we base successful relationships on. It‘s a discussion on other healthier ways to create and keep relationships. Because if sex is the be all end all, it‘s not just Aces that can be found lacking or ‘odd‘. It puts an unrealistic standard on everyone. If you‘re Ace, read this book. If you‘re not, read this book.

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

When I first came out, I had a lot of people clarify the definition of asexual to me. As if I wouldn‘t know, but also, as if I wouldn‘t know what it meant FOR ME. And it‘s great that some can just merge all forms of attraction into one, thinking they‘re all the same. It is when you really need to think about it (Aces), that you fully understand the different ways in which attraction can form.

I wanted to finish at least a couple of my 'currently reading' books before starting a new one, & I've completed 3 today, which I'm pleased with
I got something from all of them, "Ace" being the one I'll reflect upon the most, & which has been more immediately useful in helping me to identify, challenge, & hopefully adjust, some of my received assumptions, in this case about sexuality & relationships. A worthwhile read irrespective of orientation.

I came out as asexual about two years ago and it‘s beyond freeing to finally understand oneself. It‘s like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders.

I'm taking longer to read this than I should, which is nothing to do with the book & everything to do with me overextending myself with multiple books on the go. When I finish one I feel I want to pick up another new one rather than focusing on those I've already started. 😮‍💨 but also 😌
So, the chapter I've just finished about ace friendships was really thought-provoking for me as an allo person, allowing me to reflect upon some unconscious ⬇️

I wish there had been books like these when I was a younger person. They are so important and this one has been incredibly important to me. I‘m 52 and still learning things about myself and that‘s a good thing. I‘m just so glad that this generation has all this information at their fingertips. Brilliant book!
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I'm reading this to better understand asexual orientation. 22 pages in and I'm already getting enlightening perspectives. The reviews for this book are overwhelmingly positive, however I've found it helpful to read the 1⭐ reviews to fix in my mind that no book can express everybody's experience and that reading this will provide me with useful, not definitive, insight.

Heavy wet snow knocked out the power so I can't do any work. Guess I'll read 😆 #Spring #Colorado #Snow #GuessIllRead

Listened to this audiobook that was eye opening and informative. It made me consider the wide range of possibilities for individual‘s sexual experience, or lack thereof. Sex is centered in our culture, which isn‘t necessarily healthy for everyone. I‘d recommend this for everyone, for gaining perspective when it comes to intimacy, whether it be romantic or sexual.

This book is great introduction to asexuality, and the way understanding it can shape the world in a beneficial way for everyone. Highlighting the difference in sexual attraction, sexual desire, intimacy, physical attractiveness, and more. Discussing the lack of intentional conversations and expectations in relationships of all kinds, but especially where physical behavior is involved. Absolutely required reading, this book is everything.

3.5 stars. Informative but a little dry. I wish there was a directory of websites and organizations at the back of the book.

Required reading! This book not only helps bring awareness and teaches about asexuality, but it also frames the lack of intentional conversation that happens for other sexual identities regarding attraction, intimacy, friendship connection, sexual consent & desire, and romantic partnership. It‘s an incredible read. (Slightly rushed at the end, but otherwise, just really wonderful).

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This book is for everyone. Not only will you learn about the asexual community and what it means to be ace, you will learn how understanding this community and this identity benefits the world at large and can lead to more personal freedom. This book pairs well with 'Against White Feminism,' which I read about a month ago, as well as other writings on identity, disability, feminism, and other social movements. Highly recommend!

I haven't physically read a nonfiction book in a long time. It so much easier and more engaging to listen to nonfiction via audiobooks so that has become my preferred way to consume nonfiction. But since I'm already in the middle of an audiobook I decided to read ACE on my Kindle.

#nonfictionnovember #nonfiction

This week is Asexual Awareness Week. I debated making a post but I think visibility can be important. As someone who identifies as ace, but still exploring where I fit on the ace spectrum, this book was a comfort to read. But it is also a good place to start if you want to learn more about asexuality. Happy Ace Week!
#asexual #asexuality

A very helpful and accessible overview of asexuality, especially for people who do not know anything about it. Also lots of interesting observations on the value society places on sex as the ultimate experience and the ways people who do not have sex are presumed less than. My only complaint is that the author was incredibly repetitive, diluting her good points by beating them to death sometimes. But worth a read.

#readharder

Fantastic. Such a great introduction to Asexually, and it brought up many questions for me (I am not Ace) and how we look at relationships, romance, and sex.

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ I thought this was really informative and interesting!

An accessible and thought-provoking book that shares ace perspectives on feminist politics, disability, race, consent, relationships, and more. I thought the mix of Chen's personal story, those of other aces she interviewed, and her more academic writing on the topics worked really well. The observations that hit me the hardest were those about feminist attitudes to sex, consent and sex in relationships, and rape culture. Recommended!

"Aces know that sex is not always the dividing line that determines whether a relationship is romantic...Questions about the definition of romantic love are the starting point for aces to think about love and romance in unexpected ways, from new explicit categories beyond friendship and romance to the opportunities -- legal, social, and more -- of a world where romantic love is not the type of love valued above all others."

#QueerBooks

"If having sex were merely cool, this would have bothered me little. However, sex had also become feminist, and this I cared about. Through a subtle series of twists, like in a game of telephone, sex for liberal women has become more than a way to enjoy ourselves or even prove that we are desirable. Conspicuous consumption of sex has become a way to perform feminist politics."

?? so much interesting food for thought in this book!

Very informative read both for those who are on the Ace spectrum and for those who aren't. Covers the intersections between being Ace and homo or heterosexual, trans, disabled, BIPOC. Also discusses consent in a way that is beneficial for anyone regardless of identity. 4⭐️

Everyone should read this. It‘s abt so much more than assexuality- it‘s abt knowing and accepting yourself, as well as others. It‘s abt the baseline of “normal” sexuality and how it moves thru time and space. It‘s abt community, relationships, freedom, communication, and again, acceptance. It‘s also very informative, interesting, and easy to digest, so there‘s rly no reason not to dive into it 🤍

There‘s a lot to think about in this book, which examines Western society through an asexual lens. There‘s the idea that people who don‘t want sex are sick, for example. And that all disabled people are asexual. That “rape is not sex” & “no means no” are binary ways of thinking that require an overhaul. Chen emphasizes developing & normalizing language that lets us talk about emotional intimacy. Fresh perspectives shook me up in a good way. LGBTQ+

Rejecting one form of social programming makes it easier to start questioning everything else.

After reading the ace romance book Loveless, I wanted to learn more about this sexual orientation and Chen certainly taught me a lot.

Fascinating examination into sexuality. I really liked it and would recommend it for anyone

This was such an affirming book. It discusses the spectrum of issues that aces experience and is a well-rounded introduction for those new to the topic. I am grateful to have found it and would recommend it highly.

This is really written for allosexuals, but it was interesting for me too for the breadth of different experiences of asexuality that are put there, and avoiding lionising the stereotype of a gold star asexual.

It's always a relief all over again to find other people who just do not know what other people mean by sexual attraction.

Fascinating new topic for me.

In some ways, the slow increase of ace representation in books feels similar to the increase of vegan options in the world. If you‘d have told me I could have my pick of plant-based meats at the supermarket 12 years ago, I‘d have been skeptical. So I have to believe something similar is coming in book options!

https://www.bustle.com/entertainment/asexual-ace-romance-book-readers

#asexuality #asexual #acesoflitsy

I felt seen, I cried, I learned... This is a book written by someone under the ace umbrella sharing stories from other aces under the umbrella. Also with discussing why people are obsessed with sex. It‘s everywhere! But as ace, we don‘t get that. The story of the religious man fighting between his feelings vs what he‘s told he‘s obligated to in marriage hit close. Same with this above quote. Feel educated to talk to my s/o much better now
#lgbtqa

This is a great book about the diverse umbrella term that asexuality really is. What‘s nice about being able to see that is that the author has gone out and spoken to a wide array of people under different terms. It‘s so nice to hear there‘s other people down here. Especially the “no sex till marriage” young man. That one hits close to home. #lgbtqa

I find that Chen sums up this book best herself when she writes “The goal of ace liberation is simply the goal of true sexual and romantic freedom for everyone. A society that is welcoming to aces can never be compatible with rape culture; with misogyny, racism, ableism, homophobia, and transphobia;”

A brilliant book I think will be eye-opening for both ace and allo (not ace) readers, providing a look at what it means to be ace. The book explores asexuality through many perspectives and experiences, providing narrative examples as well as philosophical and psychological. The challenges aces face give a lot of insight into how the elevation of sex and sexual / romantic relationships above all else in modern society causes problems for everyone.

I did this one on audio, and the narration was excellent. There‘s a lot to learn and a lot to think about in this book. I‘d recommend it whether you identify as Ace or Aro, or if you‘re just wanting to learn more about these terms and the widely varied spectrum of human sexuality.

Sietje listened with me in the car. She may not have learned as much as I did. 🐶❤️📚

"The parent who asks one five-year-old boy which classmate he wants as a girlfriend asks another five-year-old ace or gay boy how they can already know their sexuality."

This book has so many gold star quotes!

A little lunchtime reading

Pure joy 🥰 #DogsOfLitsy #BostonTerriersOfLitsy #Pippin

One of my favorite things: sitting incorrectly in a chair, curled up around a good book! ? "Compulsory sexuality" is an important addition to the conversation about sexuality and sex, inspired by Adrienne Rich's "Compulsory Heterosexuality and Lesbian Existence." Ace (asexual) discourse has a lot to offer to understanding the full range of human sexuality and desire better!

Another virtual reading party with my love. 🥰 2 very good books being read! @CounterfeitNickel