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Damn You, Autocorrect!
Damn You, Autocorrect!: Awesomely Embarrassing Text Messages You Didn't Mean to Send | Jillian Madison
26 posts | 3 read | 3 to read
Sh#@ Your Phone Says "Damn You, Autocorrect!" If you own an iPhone, BlackBerry, Droid, or any smartphone, there's a good chance you've screamed that phrase out at least once. In Damn You, Autocorrect!, pop-culture blogger Jillian Madison shows you are not alone. Filled with submissions from readers of her popular website, this laugh-out-loud funny book features cringe-worthy exchanges with parents, friends, significant others, and co-workers that contain some of the most unintentionally hilarious--and mortifying--mistakes ever caused by Autocorrect. Inside, you'll find a husband who tells his wife that he just "laid" (paid) the babysitter, a dad who tells his daughter that he and her mom are going to "divorce" (Disney), and many more epic texting fails too raunchy to list here. Whether you love technology, texting humor, or taking just a little bit of pleasure in the misfortune of others, Damn You, Autocorrect! will leave you laughing until you cry, and thankful that nothing this embarrassing has happened to you. Yet.
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Sharpeipup
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vivastory 😂😂 5y
Slajaunie 😂😂😂 5y
Tamra Funny! 5y
Patchshank Yeah! Duck autocorrect! 5y
40 likes5 comments
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MrBook
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😂😂😂👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 #LitsyHumor

Megabooks My autocorrect is so weird. It has so many proper names in it! 5y
Crazeedi Oh how many times I've written a post or an email and then see some stupid autocorrect!! Grrrr!!! So frustrating! 5y
Caroline2 😆 5y
See All 10 Comments
julesG @Crazeedi Yes! It's so annoying. My autocorrect meanwhile speaks four languages (German, English, French and Swedish). It's actually set to check on German and English only, but I do get the odd word from the other languages added into the mix of corrections sometimes. Also, why does auto have to correct "I bet this is..." into "I get this is..."? ? 5y
Crazeedi @julesG oh wow, at least I dont have 4 languages to tell at (or tell in!!!) Lol😉 5y
Crazeedi Yellat! see even Now! @julesG 5y
julesG @Crazeedi 😂😂😂😂 typical! 5y
TheSpineView 🤣🤣 5y
ravenlee First things I do with a new phone: turn off the irritating keyboard clicks, disable autocorrect and predictive typing. My phone is not actually smarter than I am! 5y
CoverToCoverGirl Bravo.. love this one! 👏🤣 5y
116 likes10 comments
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MrBook
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😂😂😂👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 #LitsyHumor

Leftcoastzen 🤪👏👏 6y
See All 7 Comments
kgriffith Ducking right! 6y
batsy 🤣 6y
Tanisha_A Hahahaha 6y
BookBabe Duck yeah!!! 🦆 🙌🏻😄 6y
126 likes7 comments
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MrBook
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Autocorrect is my bane. 😂👏🏻 #LitsyHumor

alisonrose I found a workaround because I use so many f words that it was a necessity 😜 6y
Mamashep 😂😂😂 6y
youneverarrived 😂😂 6y
See All 8 Comments
Bronte_Chintz 😂😂 6y
tournevis I need that sign for my office door at uni. 6y
TNbookworm 😂😂 6y
BookBabe 😂😂👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻YES 6y
mariaku21 I just save all my fave verbiage amd thanks to that I never have to auto correct "duck" ever again 6y
141 likes8 comments
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Ruri_kaichou
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I'm not quite certain about this autocorrect 🤔🤔🤔

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LauraJ
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There are words I use repeatedly, every freakin‘ day that my iPhone has yet to learn. But you use the word “stabby” once and it pops up EVERY time I type “sta”. I‘m probably on some watch list now. Thanks a lot @GrilledCheeseSamurai !!! @TricksyTails was probably in on it too.
#notaserialkiller

readherwriteher I love and use the word stabby a lot. If you‘re on a watch list, I‘m on a watch list. #strengthinnumbers 7y
BookishTrish When I type Sta, I get Stalin 7y
TheBookKeepers 😂. Mine is every time I try to text my friends name Kelly it spells jelly. Every. Time. 🙄 7y
See All 8 Comments
GrilledCheeseSamurai Bwahahaha! 😂😜 7y
CouronneDhiver 😂😂😂 7y
CouronneDhiver When I type out “Sta” in my texts, it suggests “stacked”. #BlameItOnLitsy 7y
ValerieAndBooks I had to see what I‘d get when I typed out “sta” and the result was “stacking”! Yep, #blameitonLitsy 😂 @CouronneDhiver 7y
TricksyTails 🤣🤣🤣🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪 7y
46 likes8 comments
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MrBook
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😂👏🏻 #LitsyHumor

thegirlwiththelibrarybag 😂😂😂 7y
SassyBookworm Omg love it!!!! 🤣 7y
LibrarianRyan @rubyslippersreads you have probably seen it, but just incase. 7y
See All 7 Comments
Elisa Hahaha awesome 😂😂👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼 7y
Craftylikefox This is my current problem with my new phone 😂😂😂 7y
rubyslippersreads @LibrarianRyan 😂😂😂🌈🌪 7y
AndiM Soooo funny and sooo true! 😂😂😂😂 7y
133 likes7 comments
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UnabridgedTomes

Dear autocorrect, I've never once meant to type "ducking."

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MrBook
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Autocorrect, the bane of basic text communication 😂👏🏻. This is not me and @BookBabe , despite the same names, though we do enjoy Motts applesauce. 😋😉👍🏻 #LitsyHumor

BookBabe 😂😂👏🏻👏🏻 who knows, it could happen! 7y
Bklover 😂😂😂😂😂 7y
Cinfhen U guys.....u need to buy applesauce!!! It's yum with tater tots 7y
CoffeeCatsBooks 🤣🤣🤣 7y
SaraFair And there is something about the latest iphone updates that are making my mistakes like that more often! Must reread before sending! 7y
95 likes5 comments
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MrBook
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Uh, it's the ole switcheroo! 😁 #LitsyHumor

Avanders Seems intentional to me: ?"... I know there's an 'h' somewhere in that word... yeah... there... it's not uFolstery... must be there..." ???? 7y
77 likes1 comment
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MrBook
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Remember, never stope at a bus stop. It's the worst place to stope. 😉 #LitsyHumor

Alwaysbeenaloverofbooks 🤣😂🤣😂 7y
GoldenGirl 😂😂😂 7y
suvata I beg to differ. I love stoping at bus stops. 🙃 7y
See All 6 Comments
RealBooks4ever @suvata 🤣🤣🤣 7y
lisakoby 😂😂😂 7y
MariettaSG 😂 7y
103 likes6 comments
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MrBook
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Oops, wrong sw- word, I think! 😳🙈😆 #LitsyHumor

MemoirsForMe Uh-oh! 😁 7y
Sace HAHAHAHA! 7y
misslala 😂😂😂 7y
See All 8 Comments
Eggs I suppose love IS sweat but do we really need to be so graphic here??😳😜😂 7y
britt_brooke This is not inaccurate. 😆 7y
ApoptyGina69 Maybe their first dance song was "Gonna Make You Sweat" by C + C Music Factory. ? ? 7y
Erinreadsthebooks 🙈🙈🙈 7y
107 likes8 comments
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MrBook
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Do I get three? And does sand HAVE to be involved? It gets in everything 😑. #LitsyHumor

IMASLOWREADER lmao...where do you find these...funny but sad @ the same time 🤣😞 7y
Lea I actually kind of love this one 😂 7y
BarbaraTheBibliophage I wish there was sand in the sandwich! 7y
Eggs To be eaten at the beach 7y
ApoptyGina69 That's what I'd do when I still lived in San Francisco and wanted different things for my life. 7y
102 likes1 stack add5 comments
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MrBook
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Well, I don't wanna be marred! What the heck! 😳😆 #LitsyHumor

LauraJ I think that one may be more of a Freudian slip. 7y
readinginthedark 😂😂😂 7y
See All 6 Comments
kspenmoll 😂😂😂 7y
Mamashep 😂😂 7y
Cupofjo 😂 today while registering my daughter at her HS we noticed the parking permit for the school was IHRS instead of IRHS... my daughter rolled her eyes and said 'you had one job' 😂 7y
115 likes6 comments
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MrBook
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That moment when you realize your practice may be a little toooo specialized.... 😂👏🏻 #LitsyHumor

Sydsavvy Oh MY!!!! 🤣🤣🤣 that is priceless! 7y
Susanita I'm terrified that I'll do this one day on something really important. 7y
Lcsmcat 😮 7y
BookBabe 😂😂😂 7y
Leftcoastzen No proofreading anymore! Just awful!😆 7y
92 likes5 comments
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MrBook
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What does that stand for? 🤔 #LitsyHumor

Zelma Stop on the print. Step on the (brake)pedal. Oy. 7y
shawnmooney Best one of my entire life was in a parking lot across the back alley from my apartment in Vancouver years ago, painted onto the asphalt: "COSTUMER PARKING ONLY" ??? 7y
Linear Sort Of Temporary Parking 7y
Cupofjo @Linear 😂😂 7y
103 likes5 comments
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MrBook
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Hmmm. Why would someone want to spend $8.99/pound (plus sales tax) on crap? Even if it is fresh? Why would someone spend any money on it, except the farmers where I grew up? 😂 #LitsyHumor

BarbaraTheBibliophage Ewww. 😜 7y
LibrarianRyan Heck I have a doggie door. I can get that free. 7y
Rachbb3 Well I guess as long as it's fresh....😂😂 7y
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Lmstraubie 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 7y
Alwaysbeenaloverofbooks Love it!!!! 🤣 7y
Hooked_on_books My BF says he has some fresh crap available at a much better price. 😂 7y
SaraFair And its on special- usually a lot more- 7y
107 likes7 comments
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Yossarian
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Unclear why Litsy's spell-checker suggests I replace the perfectly correct "cinnamon muffin" with the also correct but much more mysterious "cunning muffin."

I always suspected there were more to muffins than they let on, but now at last some solid evidence!

MMFinck :))) 8y
KimHM 😂😂😂 8y
PennyPistol 😂 8y
100 likes1 stack add4 comments
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Titania
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How I feel everytime I reread a response I've made on Litsy...

Bookgirl Haha yes, hoping for an edit option one day! 8y
Titania @Bookgirl Me, too! 8y
Gezemice Nice. 👍 8y
See All 7 Comments
Gezemice @Bookgirl There is an edit option on posts. Click the three dots on the bottom right. 8y
Bookgirl @Gezemice brilliant, thanks! 8y
Titania @Gezemice but still no edit on comments, right? 8y
Gezemice @Titania No, but you can delete and re-add them. 8y
17 likes7 comments