WildWomenReading

Catching up with my September recap. I read less than August due to a really busy work month with less captured reading time on flights but still managed to complete 11 books + 2 Vonnegut stories & 2.5 chapters of Women Who Run With the Wolves.

I finished books for #SundayBuddyRead #NancyDrewBR #BobWhiteBuddies #EBBR #SheSaid #MonthlyNonFiction #ThematicCozies #FictionalTraveler #Roll100 (3) & AuthorAMonth & ongoing read #WildWomenReading

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Riveted_Reader_Melissa, Soubhiville, TheBookHippie, Librarybelle, Ruthiella, TheAromaofBooks, PuddleJumper, julieclair

DebinHawaii … Favorites were: Detective Aunty, Eve, Your Shadow Half Remains & The Husbands. 1w

Ruthiella Not bad for a busy month! 👏👏👏 1w

Librarybelle Yay!! 1w

TheAromaofBooks Woohoo!! Great month!!! 7d

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Chrissyreadit

Women Who Run with the Wolves: Myths and Stories of the Wild Woman Archetype | Clarissa Pinkola Est�s Phd

I have been wondering why this subgenre is so popular. As someone who has been stalked and assaulted I have a hard time finding the romance in any of this- it lends more to horror for me (although i did think Hooked told a good story and was shocked i liked it) But when reading chapter 2 in the book I wonder if this is a different way to understand the dark man in our psyches. Or is this representing our Shadows and our own dark sides? I have

CaroPi, DebinHawaii, Cuilin, AmyG, kspenmoll, TheBookHippie, JenniferEgnor, Suet624, Deblovestoread, zezeki, BookwormAHN, PathfinderNicole, GingerAntics, ravenlee, CBee, dabbe, ElizaMarie, ImperfectCJ, nanuska_153, ncsufoxes, lil1inblue

Chrissyreadit so many thoughts and hopes for discussion on this topic- What do these books heal in us? or What messages do you get from genres with more violence and/or taboo themes? How do you respond to taboo? Could that be a dark man in your life? 3w

GingerAntics Yeah, I‘ve wondered that myself. I used to enjoy those books as a teen, until I was stalked, abused, etc. Now they just don‘t sit right with me. I‘ve always seen it as the predator trying to convince us that their harm is actually good/romantic. I find it troubling that more and more of this is written by women. 3w

TheBookHippie @Chrissyreadit @GingerAntics interestingly I‘ve found unhealed women read these and healed women abhor them. Only reason I say this is it‘s how I feel and then I got into a discussion with some women and they said they read it for comfort because it was comforting. When they got to healing and therapy they no longer could read it. Interesting. I honestly don‘t know over all- that‘s a tiny group here at a women shelter book club. I personally ⬇️ 2w

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TheBookHippie Don‘t read this type of book. I don‘t read certain subjects because I do not believe it‘s ethical and is sometimes theater trauma or voyeur trauma. No thanks. There are things I lived I care not to read about. It‘s not what I use reading for. I however have no issue with people who need it or want it. Personal choice is not my business. 🙃 2w

GingerAntics @TheBookHippie that‘s a really valid point. If some people want to read it, like it, more power to them I guess. I still find it heartbreaking that falling for the predator is this massive trope. I mean, even Beauty and the Beast falls into this. We‘re selling it to little kids as normal. 2w

TheBookHippie @GingerAntics I adored dark fairytales as a child and they were comforting because no happy ending and it was real. Like my life. Disney fairytales made me angry because I felt it was lying. It is probably why I adore Alice in Wonderland more than the others. I still love Dark FairyTales but now it‘s just nostalgia -look what saved me. 2w

lil1inblue @TheBookHippie I tend to agree with you. I don't find an overall value in this type of book, and it does feel voyeuristic. Not gonna judge others for reading it, but it's not for me. 🎯 2w

BookwormAHN I don't know, I read Anne Rice's Beauty novels as a teenager and they really freaked me out. Having said that Haunting Adeline is on my tbr. I think it just depends on the story and my mood 🤷🏼‍♀️ 2w

ravenlee I wonder if some of the appeal of reading this is that, at any point, you can put it down. It‘s a small power, but sometimes that‘s all you‘ve got. Maybe the glimpse into the male motivation validates something for some readers (largely the ones who think rape is about sex rather than power - I had someone explain rape fantasy to me as “making a man so wild he can‘t overcome his desire for me” 🤢). 2w

GingerAntics @ravenlee 🤮 gross! I don‘t mind a mutual chasing fantasy, where a couple who have developed a relationship and trust have this shared fantasy of chasing and catching and whatever… because it‘s mutual and it‘s a good time for all. I just don‘t understand rape fantasies, though. Just, gross. It seriously sounds like something a man made up and convinced some women they actually had. 2w

GingerAntics @TheBookHippie I like original fairytales too. They are more about teaching kids about life and reality than this Disney crap. I loved Disney movies as a kid, but mostly for the music. If it‘s a musical, I‘ll watch just about anything. lol 2w

TheBookHippie @ravenlee controlling the narrative is big. Rape is about power and control. So they are controlling at what they can take in is plausible. Uncontrollable desire is a myth. Insecure women fall for it everyday … 2w

AmyG I am always fascinated by people who do things I‘d never dream of doing. What compels them. It‘s all about understanding why. @ravenlee Yes…understanding the motivation. But I don‘t read these either or don‘t intentionally read them or even like them. (edited) 2w

AnnCrystal This is an incredible thread to read through.

Personally I can't read stories or watch movies with this kind of romance...well, too much gore or sex just gets annoying anyway...but painting this kind of sinister romance seems dangerous.

I like a good beauty and the beast story, there's a message there. There's more to a person besides their “good“ or “bad“ looks.

But respect and trust in a relationship should be things that are highlighted. 👇 2w

AnnCrystal I haven't read these titles, but I have had the opportunity to buy each of these books. Thankfully I researched beforehand or read the book's “warning.“

I have accidentally read books like these. If too terrible, they usually get donated, unfinished. Otherwise I skip along.

I feel that stories like these might make a young girl believe that this kind of disrespect is ok, natural, acceptable.

👇🏼

2w

AnnCrystal In a world with so many predators and bullies, we need stories that teach our young girls what respect means.

I believe there are many of us who are looking warriors, and so many mistake cruelty for strength... (edited) 2w

ElizaMarie So, I am behind on the #WildWomenReading, so I am going to answer this (but not using the current reading to guide my discussion). I have been stalked/beaten/tortured/sexually assaulted AND I have read these types of books (only Lights Out on this list). I don't know why I do. I don't know if its a feeling of control. Like I can read about these things, and be fully “safe“. I watch documentaries about DV, watch Law & Order SVU, podcast truecrime ⬇ 2w

ElizaMarie And yet, when I feel unsafe or triggered. I can use my coping skills, or totally avoid/DNF/quit the subject. I don't know if it's a test of my boundaries and my feelings of safety, or what it is. I am currently reading this one and am very much struggling with it. He is a stalker/user/rapist. I am more than likely going to DNF it. Some of these dark “romances“ are about stalking and/or coercion, but they try to pretend the woman finds it ⬇ (edited) 2w

ElizaMarie desirable. Which helps me not think of it as “rape“ even though the parallels are there. 2w

ElizaMarie @ravenlee I answered this, then went back and read everyone's comments - I think that's what it does for me. I can put it down. I can choose, where in the past, that choice was taken from me. 2w

ElizaMarie @AnnCrystal I agree with the concern of having young girls feel this type of male attention is “normal“ or should be “sought“. I, too, worry about what we teach children (both boys and girls) about consent, respect, kindness, and general human-ness.

I don't know how old. You are, but have you seen stories about how we as a society talked about women's bodies in the 90s? That was my teenage years and deeply ingrained into my psyche. 2w

AnnCrystal @ElizaMarie 💝🫂💝 the 90s were my childhood years.

That's true, we need to teach the boys too. We need to encourage these important teachings into our children daily lives.

For one of the books I accidentally read recently, I went researching about it after and saw a review from a young woman. She said it had been the very first book she ever read and believed that the abuse in the book was just how romance was, normal. 2w

AnnCrystal @ElizaMarie that review has really remain with me. The same reviewer stated that she has now read other books, and has come to realize her mistake. But her words spoke volume.

You're right. I believe so much more work needs to be done to educate our children on what a healthy relationship truly is...

💝🫂💝. 2w

ElizaMarie @AnnCrystal wow that review is so powerfully heartbreaking. I can see why it stuck. (Thanks for sharing that with me) 2w

AnnCrystal @ElizaMarie 🥲👌🏼💝🫂💝. 2w

Chrissyreadit @ElizaMarie @AnnCrystal One thing i find interesting is that sex in the books i grew up reading was always focused on male pleasure or denegrating women… or that women are left… or get pregnant and left- We really did not have any sex positive stuff- Then i remember Delta of Venus…. written by Anais Nin and very rough for women…. 2w

AnnCrystal @Chrissyreadit 📚🥺📚 Terrible truth. I will search about Anais Nin 😉👍🏼📚💝.

Most of the books that seem easiest to run across are usually the ones showcasing abuse and bullying as romance. It enrages me that it seems so difficult to find romance stories that depict good, well structured relationships.

Truthfully, I'm not much of a romance reader, I prefer love stories to that are woven into the background of the main story events. 2w

AnnCrystal @ElizaMarie I checked my notes. The book I was referring to was:

Twisted love by Ana Huang, the review had been on Goodreads.

Just wanted to make a reference note.

📚💝📚. 2w

ElizaMarie @AnnCrystal ❤️❤️❤️❤️ 2w

48 likes29 comments

ElizaMarie

Women Who Run with the Wolves: Myths and Stories of the Wild Woman Archetype | Clarissa Pinkola Est�s Phd

Amor Eterno - Brings me to tears every time I hear it. I personally enjoy Vicente singing it the most (because I like him the most), but of course, it's Juan Gabriel's song and Rocio Durcal brought a feminine beauty to it.

Links:
Chete: https://youtu.be/giRA5xFG294?si=Jz5FnN-PJOdFv3_0
Gabriel: https://youtu.be/RgKqxLAhRKE?si=8cm0zINc1WvEac-7
Rocio (with translation) : https://youtu.be/JRCQGw9y3O8?si=HPAo8RXPek6nOHC_

#WildWomenReading

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ElizaMarie

Women Who Run with the Wolves: Myths and Stories of the Wild Woman Archetype | Clarissa Pinkola Est�s Phd

I was in a severely abusive relationship, which almost killed me (literally). Not only was this physically abusive, but it was also emotional (the lasting effects have lingered). I used to dance, my whole life, since childhood, (tap, jazz, flocorico, ballet, cheer) I danced, used to dance in our relationship, around the house, wiggle here, wiggle there, sing, play... He frequently told me I was too ugly, fat, and unworthy of enjoying my body ⬇️

ElizaMarie I slowly stopped at the point of quitting. Now, I am hesitant to dance. My husband is amazing, loving, and healing. He is playful, and I am safe. My head sometimes forgets this.

#WildWomenReading
#LaLobaWithin (edited) 4w

TheBookHippie 💜💜💜💜 I hope you dance. I have to tell my brain it‘s okay, you‘re safe now. Sending you light my friend. 💜💜💜💜 4w

Eggbeater 🫂 4w

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Ruthiella ❤️❤️❤️ 4w

lil1inblue I'm so glad you're safe now and have a supportive partner! I hope you're able to dance again. You deserve to enjoy being in your body. 💓🫂 💓 4w

BarkingMadRead I just want to hug you! 4w

DaveGreen7777 I am so sorry you were put through this from your abusive ex-partner but so happy for you that you were able to get away from him and find true happiness! 4w

nanuska_153 Sorry you went through this, it's so difficult to live with it even when you are finally free. Hope you find again the music within you and the joy to dance even if you start when you are alone ❤️ 4w

dabbe I am so saddened that you experienced this at the hands of someone who was supposed to love you. No one has any right to steal any of our joys. Your husband is a major mensch, and I'm so glad you have him in your life. Even if you just start out dancing in your head, I hope those hips start swaying. You are beautiful inside and out, and the universe would love to see you dance again. 🧡💜💛 4w

ElizaMarie @TheBookHippie - My brain 🧠 doesn't always want to listen to me, but sometimes, I can get it to follow my heart :) ♥️ 4w

ElizaMarie @Eggbeater @Ruthiella @Lil1inblue @BarkingMadRead - Thank you so much for your kind words. Yall are so sweet! 4w

ElizaMarie @DaveGreen7777 Thank you so much for your kind words. I am in a wholly better place, and am so thankful for it. I am happy, just need to find the little joys and incorporate them into my everyday. 4w

ElizaMarie @nanuska_153 Memory is rough, I am at times reminded of the past, which sometimes prevents me from living my now. I am working on it (with therapy, self-care/reflection, all those things. 4w

TheBookHippie @ElizaMarie SAME. It‘s a daily battle sometimes. Pockets of joy and routine work for me but mostly writing works. Also Mr BookHippie leaves me hand written notes, it helps a bunch. I think sometimes seeing it written out helps your brain. Sending you so much love. 4w

ElizaMarie @dabbe Thank you for your kindness. I am working on enjoying music more and, in turn, moving my body more. It's a process, but I am slowly gaining some joy back. 4w

kspenmoll I am so sad for you but so happy you kept on dancing & letting yourself express joy. So glad you are in a better place! 4w

dabbe @ElizaMarie Just do this, and laugh! 🕺🕺🕺 😍😂😍 3w

23 likes17 comments

ElizaMarie

Women Who Run with the Wolves: Myths and Stories of the Wild Woman Archetype | Clarissa Pinkola Est�s Phd

My “La Loba's“ place would be a hammock on the beach. I love the sun, so during the day, I read out by the hammock, lightly swaying in the breeze (add a stand/table for drinks and snacks). At night, sleeping outside under the stars, hearing the waves. PERFECTION!

#WildWomenReading
#LaLobaWithin

TheBookHippie Oh this looks so peaceful. 4w

ElizaMarie @TheBookHippie My hamoock outside is not as serene, but it is still very lovely. I do enjoy sunbathing there, and reading.. Hammocks are just the best! 4w

lil1inblue Oh, this sounds so serene! 😍 Love hammock time! ❤ 4w

dabbe L🩵VERLY. 🩵💙🩵 4w

ElizaMarie @Lil1InBlue @Dabbe - Yes! It looks like such a peaceful place. Which is all too important. 4w

22 likes5 comments

ElizaMarie

Women who Run with the Wolves: Contacting the Power of the Wild Woman | Clarissa Pinkola Est's

Traditions ground me: didn't realize how much I rely on them
1. Dia de Los Muertos - we celebrated growing up, and my husband and I celebrate in our home
2. Tamales during winter
3. Reading Christmas Carol every Dec 1 - something I used to do with my grandmother
4. Bunuelos on NYE
5. Talking about our gratitude during Thanksgiving Dinner
6. Reading Jonathan Livingston Seagull on Sept 15 - Daddy's Bday
7. Taking the day off on my Bday - Oct 14 ⬇️

CaroPi, DebinHawaii, Cuilin, TheBookHippie, Deblovestoread, Chrissyreadit, zezeki, BookwormAHN, PathfinderNicole, GingerAntics, ravenlee, dabbe, nanuska_153, ncsufoxes, lil1inblue

ElizaMarie I am sure I have a ton more that I don't really consider traditions. Maybe I am thinking of rituals. One I would love to try but haven't - I would like to work more on spiritual traditions revolving around the seasons. I scream out/sing into the moonlight on full moons (not consistently). I would like to have some sort of water tradition too. I love the ocean, I used to crave it at certain parts of the year, sun bathe, lay in water, but ⬇️ 4w

ElizaMarie Since COVID and moving to VT, I haven't been near the beaches. I would like to work on bringing that into my life.

#WildWomenReading
#LaLobaWithin (edited) 4w

julieclair What a lovely list! 4w

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TheBookHippie Just lovely. 4w

Chrissyreadit I love this post and your traditions!💛 4w

lil1inblue What a wonderful list! The traditions for Dia de Los Muertos are so beautiful. ❤ 4w

dabbe L💜VERLY list! If you love JL Seagull, you'll love THE LITTLE PRINCE. 🧡💜💛 4w

nanuska_153 Buñuelos 🤤🤤 4w

ElizaMarie @JulieClair @TheBookHippie @ChrissyReadIt - Thank you! I enjoyed thinking about what traditions we hold dear to us. This exercise has also helped me identify others that, although not as strong, are ones I am cultivating in our home. 4w

ElizaMarie @Lil1InBlue Dia de Los Muertos is my favorite time of year! I love how much it brings us together across generations and families. (edited) 4w

TheBookHippie @ElizaMarie ♥️♥️♥️♥️ 4w

ElizaMarie @Dabbe - I am gonna read it on Libby soon, (just placed the hold) then eventually get my own copy :) 4w

ElizaMarie @nanuska_153 They are the best!!! 4w

dabbe @ElizaMarie It's on its way to you and should be there by Sunday. 🧡💜🩶 3w

24 likes14 comments

nanuska_153

Women Who Run with the Wolves: Myths and Stories of the Wild Woman Archetype | Clarissa Pinkola Est�s Phd

I used to make up jingles about whatever I was doing and I was always listening to music and singing.At some point in my 20s I was raped and shortly afterwards I ended up in an abusive relationship that lasted many years.I can't really remember anything that happened for some time after the relationship ended, there is a blank space, I remember things that happened to me, but as if someone had told me a story, not as if I had actually lived them⬇️

nanuska_153 Then I remember a time when I was reconstructing myself, trying to act the way I used to be, putting back the pieces together. But during this time there was silence, I wasn't singing or listening to music, not like I usually did as if there was a constant soundtrack to my life. I managed to get back the soundtrack of my life and the singing, but the ability to make jingles I never got back. ⬇️ 4w

nanuska_153 I miss being the kind of person that can just make a tune about cheese just because it's so tasty. The first time I heard my daughter making up a stupid song while we were playing I got so emotional I had to leave the room so she wouldn't get scared. I love her jingles so much ❤️ This chapter was very interesting to me, because I don't know if I reconstructed myself through singing, but I definitely had to reconstruct myself in order to sing. 4w

nanuska_153 #wildwomenreading @Chrissyreadit @CaroPi @DebinHawaii @Cuilin @kspenmoll @TheBookHippie @JenniferEgnor @Deblovestoread @zezeki @BookwormAHN @PathfinderNicole @GingerAntics @ravenlee @dabbe @ElizaMarie 4w

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Chrissyreadit Thank you for sharing that part of you❤️I am so glad you are on this journey with us And i hope one day you and your daughter are making jingles together! 4w

Suet624 Thank you for sharing this with us. 💕💕 4w

Bookwomble ❤️‍🩹 4w

Cuilin I wish you many jingles, and maybe one day both you and your daughter can make sweet jingles together. 4w

Ruthiella ❤️❤️❤️ 4w

lil1inblue Thank you for sharing this. I hope you can find that musical magic again! 💓 💖 💓 4w

nanuska_153 @Chrissyreadit @Suet624 @Bookwomble @Cuilin @Ruthiella @lil1inblue Thank you all so much for your kind words 💕 4w

ElizaMarie Thank you for your bravery and for sharing your story with us. I am so sorry that you lost your safety, voice, and freedom. That carefree spirit to sing at a whim, giggle, and have a great time is so near and dear to me as well. I used to be very “silly“ (what it was labeled as), but men have chastized me for these personality quirks as well. It became unsafe. I am glad your daughter has a momma like you, who finds joy in her fun. ⬇️ 4w

ElizaMarie I hope you find your jingles again! (Do you watch Bob's Burgers? It's very Linda.) Maybe start small, it could come back. Add a verse or two to your daughter's? I am looking forward to hearing more about your progress and journey towards this. 4w

JenniferEgnor I‘ve been there too. Happened a long time ago but somehow it doesn‘t feel like it was. I also had abuses in my childhood and adolescence at home…I ended up in two abusive relationships but got out of them. Sending love and hugs. 3w

nanuska_153 @ElizaMarie Oh I just saw this, thanks for your kind words ❤️ I'm sorry you got that experience, hope you find a safe space where you can be who you are. I haven't watched Bob's Burgers but I heard is very good! 3w

nanuska_153 @JenniferEgnor I'm sorry to hear, it is a sad club to be a part of. I'm glad you made it out of those awful relationships, must feel scary to have ended up there again. I hope you break the cycle and this doesn't happen to you again. Sending you lots of love 💕 3w

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