Welcome to Litsy!

Thanks for inviting me to join the #WDNCW club @dabbe ! Thought I‘d combine it with a haiku because, well, why not? 😆

We really don‘t care
the floor is covered with hair;
it can stay right there.

We do not care that the house hasn‘t been cleaned in a month because I dislocated my hip and have been gimping around ever since. We do not care that my hair is everywhere. I‘ll vacuum tomorrow! 😵‍💫

#haikuhive #haikuaday #poetry

(This is maybe going to be a long post)

This is totally a #blameitonlitsy - it just kept on appearing and appearing and appearing in my feed. So who am I to fight Reading Destiny? And yes, it was a good thing to listen to it. RD knows what I need.

Because I so, so needed that book. It's short and easy to read, and it has to be. It's written for people in very dark places and those often don't have the strength and energy to read big books. ⬇

Wow. Yeah. That's me. Still.

My #BookSpin is a #blameitonlitsy - you all just kept on talking about it. Is that FOMO - Bookish edition?
Volume 4 of the Lady Astronaut series is my #DoubleSpin 💖

@TheAromaOfBooks

This book strives to reset our mindsets. Society teaches us that to be a “good” person/parent/spouse we should have a neat, clean house. The author suggests that a neat, clean house is not an issue of goodness or badness; it‘s a functional issue. We aren‘t meant to be the servant to house. It is supposed to serve us. With that change in mindset, the goal is no longer perfection but function. On days when parenting, chronic pain, work, etc keeps ⬇️

I really like the last one. Good enough is perfect.

All the best laid plans…

Care tasks are morally neutral. Being good or bad at them has nothing to do with being a good person, parent, man, woman, spouse, friend. Literally nothing. You are not a failure because you can‘t keep up with laundry. Laundry is morally neutral.

I started this ebook today.

I don‘t usually seek out self help books, but this book helped me to start unpacking my belief that clean house = good person. It‘s not nearly that simple or easy.

Unraveling where I learned that also helped start me on a self examination journey that, I hope, has made me a better person.

#SundayFunday Have a wonderful day, and don‘t forget to tag me.

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Just what I needed to help motivate me to make my space work for myself and to help remove the shame around having a “messy” house or not keeping it clean enough 100% of the time, which makes me feel like a failure.

Short and fast paced. Recommended to me by a non-litsy friend.

#catsoflitsy Hazel being my reading buddy

I did not touch my Penman book this weekend.

“How to Keep House While Drowning“ was absolutely amazing. I feel seen-this book is written not only for those with ADHD, but those struggling with depression, anxiety, and daily pain. This is one of those books I want a copy of!

I bailed on the “Silence“ book. I laid it down and did everything but pick it up on Saturday-back it goes.

#weeklyforecast
#bookreport

This is a great book if you are having trouble with your day-to-day house chores, or if you are depressed and feel like every small task is a mountain. I'm not at that stage right now. So it wasn't what I was looking for. My stuff is tucked into cupboards and closets, under beds and inside storage containers. My house is clean. It is NOT organized. I want to purge the house of everything unnecessary. This book made me feel like I'm doing great.🙈

I wouldn't have picked this one up if it wasn't for @sebrittainclark 's #AuldLangSpine list but I'm glad I did! This was a really helpful and encouraging book on how to keep your home livable without stressing yourself out more. I don't have ADHD or depression, which is a big focus of the author's life, but anyone can relate to feeling overwhelmed by everyday tasks and she provides useful manageable tips
@monalyisha #Nonfiction2024

It‘s amazing the power of hearing that you‘re not alone in your sense of drowning. Life is still a struggle, but Davis‘ words have given me hope, courage, and even skills to help work my way through it. The practical advice provided is actual advice that can help with setting priorities, getting through life tasks that can be or seem overwhelming, and realizing/accepting that you are not a failure for not maintaining an Insta worthy environment.

A late update to my #ReadingBracket2024
I only finished one nonfiction book in September. It was a quick yet encouraging listen

Starting my September #doublespin.
This has been on my #tbr for well over a year.
I own a paperback copy and have borrowed the #audiobook from the library THREE times. It is time to finally read it.

It was recommended to me by 2 people in the mental health field and my GP..

Finished cleaning out the fridge and it truly shines ♥️ grateful to have food and a place to keep it

This is a book I think I'm going to need to need to revisit with some frequency to really let it sink in. Davis is a therapist who struggled with guilt over the state of her home after giving birth, suffering from post-partum depression, & living in lockdown. She gives a lot of great practical advice for neurodivergent readers, too, including talking about how to manage tasks when you have executive dysfunction & task avoidance.

My sister recommended How to Keep House While Drowning to me recently when we were talking about cleaning and dealing with perpetual disarray. It's been a great audiobook to listen to while I work on "resetting my space," as Davis would say. I do have to keep pausing it to jot down thoughts and notes though ? So far, I would say I highly recommend it to anyone who struggles with care tasks and keeping a tidy space.

It‘s a pick for the right reader. There‘s a valuable message about inherent worthiness and the moral neutrality of a tidy home (no “cleanliness is next to godliness” here). Plus, some practical tips for how to start, or even just tackle the most crucial things, when overwhelmed. But it wasn‘t exactly what I needed, at least not beyond the reminder of how much work I need to do in shedding my perfectionism and separating my motivation from shame.

This book is perfect.

If you can‘t tell I‘m a little preoccupied with how messy my house is 🙃

I get amazed when I see all these people all of the things they clean daily or weekly on FB. I‘m horrible at cleaning, luckily I have a husband that cleans the bathrooms & we have a pretty even split of tasks. This is not really a how to clean book but more of a reminder to go easy on yourself. I think in a world of where we see all these images of perfection on social media it‘s hard to not feel overwhelmed. I also like how the author highlights

Definitely a self-care and compassionate book.

It was a really hard choice between How to Keep House While Drowning by KC Davis and A Power Unbound by Freya Marske, but at the end of the year, I think How to Keep House While Drowning is the standout book for me in 2023.

Thanks for making this fun 2023 graphic @chasjjlee!

1. How to Keep House While Drowning by KC Davis
2. Tie between Love Quest by Camilla Isley and Meet Me Under the Mistletoe by Jenny Bayliss
3. Just my usual evening plan to read and relax after my toddler goes to sleep.
4. No, it's not really a thing here.
5. Brown, but that's to be expected here. I think I've only ever experienced one or two white Christmases.

#WinterGames #USS @dabbe

I enjoyed this much more than a similar book I listened to recently called "Unfuck your habit". This one was gentler, more inclusive of different situations, and had better tips and advice that changed my mind about the way I view myself and and my cleaning ?
"Do a little. Do it badly. Do it incompletely. Do it kinda/sorta. Do it for 5 minutes. An excellent life is made up of a lot of littles. Who has the time for perfection anyways?" -KC Davis

I am not a self help book kind of a person but gosh I really loved and needed this. The author is a therapist and I found her insights really helpful. The idea of care tasks as morally neutral and the need for the equal rest time in a partnership will stay the most - the actual cleaning stuff I was less into! I am also claiming to my nonfiction prompt for imagine as if implemented this is life changing to me

It‘s taken me a little over a year to finish this short book, but I enjoyed digesting little bits of it at a time. Post partum hit me hard and I still struggle with daily tasks, but this book stresses being gentle with yourself and seeing “chores” as “care tasks.” I highly recommend. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

A client told me about this book months ago, & I‘ve seen several therapists suggest it for clients on our Teams chat. Since I have a hard time with household tasks & have recommended it to clients, I wanted to read it. Audiobook is only 3 hrs. Davis writes in quick chapters & readers can skip some. Some of it I found useful for me, a lot will be useful to clients, I think. I like her ideas about cleaning & the different mindset about “care tasks”.

It‘s been a minute and I still have letters to get out. I have missed this app and my reading. I have been way to busy. Now I am about to have a high school graduate. I am not ready for that either. I have missed you all. I am finally slowing down and trying to smell the roses, or at least if my allergies will let me.
#treadingwater #findmyway #keepswimming

#goodnotgreat The author‘s philosophy - that care tasks have no moral value attached to them, and that our space exists to serve us not the other way around - is super useful to hear. Her background is as a therapist, so she makes connections between the messages we got growing up re chores, and our self talk as adults that were really insightful. BUT the actual systems she proposes are no more useful than any other self help book imho…

I‘m on the fringe of Davis‘s readership because I don‘t have the means to hire out help. I do have “chore trauma”. As a result, I only clean in an empty or sleeping house. I do it silently, & I don‘t ask for help. I don‘t have friends over b/c I can‘t meet my own standards. It is a relief to be told my trauma isn‘t my children‘s trauma. Coincidentally, I share some of her cleaning techniques. Also, I do follow Davis on the 🕰️ app.

While there are general tips in here , the biggest theme is how much shame & anxiety we conjure because we think our home isn‘t clean enough.Let yourself off the hook.Your standards may not be your mothers or friends, your space is there to serve you not for you to serve the space.I love that Davis suggests that rest and self care should be put ahead of all the chores when needed. Also , be happy that a little progress is better than none.

Another gem from this chapter, in Helenese, is “It‘s not dumb if it works.”

If you feel like you are drowning, struggling to manage even the basics of caring of yourself, your family, and home - especially if this is resulting in feelings of shame and self-loathing - please pick up this book. The methods in this book meet you wherever you are at and focus on having a space that is functional you & your family. I found the book helped me reframe my thinking and personalize my approach to tackling “care tasks” for success

I loved Dreams Bigger Than Heartbreak by Charlie Jane Anders and Dawn by Octavia Butler, but How to Keep House While Drowning by KC Davis was a clear winner for February

@chasjjlee

5/5

This is such a lovely book. It's truly a compassionate discussion of how to make your home functional for yourself, not to anyone else's standards of what is or isn't clean enough. It's a beautiful book that meets you where you are, and it inspired me to tackle a room that's become a bit of a mess since my son was born.

I‘m horrible at keeping house. Like, it makes my stomach ache when I think about it. I really love Domesticblisters on TikTok, so I acquired this, her book. I shouldn‘t be crying over this, right?

A reminder to us all from the book that is changing my life!

Such a good book. Easy read and incredibly helpful